God had to step in and visited ten terrible plagues upon Egypt. They were:

  • Gender Neutral Bathrooms
  • Tuition-Free Public College
  • Paid Family Leave
  • Sensible Gun Control
  • $15.00 Federal Minimum Wage
  • Internet Privacy
  • Carbon Tax
  • Dodd-Frank
  • Campaign Finance Reform
  • Universal Health Care

Egyptians suffered greatly during these plagues. Everyone was getting the same opportunities. Pharaoh couldn’t handle it. After each plague, Pharaoh agreed to let the Jews go. But once the plague disappeared he’d tweet:

“FAKE NEWS got it wrong again — Jews know they r better off w/me than Moses. LOSER!!”

haggadah Section: -- Ten Plagues
Source: McSweeny's