Dr. Seuss' Four Questions

Haggadah Section: -- Four Questions
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The Four Questions

Why is it only
on Passover night
we never know how
to do anything right?
We don't eat our meals
in the regular ways,
the ways that we do
on all other days.

'Cause on all other nights
we may eat
all kinds of wonderful
good bready treats,
like big purple pizza
that tastes like a pickle,
crumbly crackers
and pink pumpernickel,
sassafras sandwich
and tiger on rye,
fifty felafels in pita,
fresh-fried,
with peanut-butter
and tangerine sauce
spread onto each side
up-and-down, then across,
and toasted whole-wheat bread
with liver and ducks,
and crumpets and dumplings,
and bagels and lox,
and doughnuts with one hole
and doughnuts with four,
and cake with six layers
and windows and doors.
Yes--
on all other nights
we eat all kinds of bread,
but tonight of all nights
we munch matzo instead.

And on all other nights
we devour
vegetables, green things,
and bushes and flowers,
lettuce that's leafy
and candy-striped spinach,
fresh silly celery
(Have more when you're finished!)
cabbage that's flown
from the jungles of Glome
by a polka-dot bird
who can't find his way home,
daisies and roses
and inside-out grass
and artichoke hearts
that are simply first class!
Sixty asparagus tips
served in glasses
with anchovy sauce
and some sticky molasses--
But on Passover night
you would never consider
eating an herb
that wasn't all bitter.

And on all other nights
you would probably flip
if anyone asked you
how often you dip.
On some days I only dip
one Bup-Bup egg
in a teaspoon of vinegar
mixed with nutmeg,
but sometimes we take
more than ten thousand tails
of the Yakkity-birds
that are hunted in Wales,
and dip them in vats
full of Mumbegum juice.
Then we feed them to Harold,
our six-legged moose.
Or we don't dip at all!
We don't ask your advice.
So why on this night
do we have to dip twice?

And on all other nights
we can sit as we please,
on our heads, on our elbows,
our backs or our knees,
or hang by our toes
from the tail of a Glump,
or on top of a camel
with one or two humps,
with our foot on the table,
our nose on the floor,
with one ear in the window
and one out the door,
doing somersaults
over the greasy k'nishes
or dancing a jig
without breaking the dishes.
Yes--
on all other nights
you sit nicely when dining--
So why on this night
must it all be reclining?

Source:  
www.acs.ucalgary.ca/~elsegal/Uncle_Eli/Eli.html
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Haggadot
Table of contents
    Introduction
  • Pesach
  • Opening Song
  • Ice Breaker
  • Matzah Show - Muppets Parody
  • The Passover Seder - A How-To Guide
  • No Seder Like Our Seder
  • Two Minute Haggadah
  • The Sorting Hat of Passover
  • Jokes
  • What is Hametz?
  • What is Kitniyot?
  • A Half-Baked Passover History Mystery
  • Quick Seder Plate Guide
  • Matzah
    • Five Fun Facts About Passover
    • Four Parents
    • Passover according to Lego
      • Kadesh
    • Kiddush
    • Take Us Out of Egypt
      • Urchatz
    • Hand Washing
      • Karpas
    • Karpas Drawing Activity
    • Ha'Adamah
      • Yachatz
    • Bread of Affliction
    • The Middle Matzah Horcrux
    • Visual Yachatz
      • Maggid - Beginning
    • Passover Play - a ten minute script for all ages
    • Maggid in Egypt (sephardi)
    • No Seder Like Our Seder - A Passover Song
      • -- Exodus Story
    • Star Wars / Sci-fi Seder Intro
    • Exodus Story - Drawing Activity
    • macabeats story
    • DAYENU: An Exercise in Gratitude
    • Let Us Go
    • Three Second Flip Book Haggadah
    • Moses Parts the Sea
    • Seda' Club
      • -- Four Questions
    • Four Funny Questions
    • Dr. Seuss' Four Questions
    • Ma Nishtana (The Four Questions) - Learn what they mean and how to sing them
      • -- Four Children
    • Four Children
    • Four Children - Drawing Activity (2)
    • Four Sons Song - to the tune of Clementine
    • Four sons
    • The Child Who Doesn't Know how to Ask a Question
    • The Simple Child
    • The Wicked Child
    • The Wise Child
    • Four Children
    • GBM Four Children Art Contest
      • -- Ten Plagues
    • Ten Plagues - Frog
    • Science explanation of the Plagues
    • Bible Raps Presents: Oregon Hillel Raps the Plagues
    • The Ten Plagues
      • -- Cup #2 & Dayenu
    • We are grateful ~ Dayenu
    • Dayenu (English - song)
    • Dayenu: Learn the words to the Passover Seder song
      • Rachtzah
    • Rachtzah
    • Step-By-Step Seder: Step 6, Rachtza
      • Songs
    • The Enchanted Matza
    • Eliana Light, “BaShanah HaZeh”
    • Chag Gad Ya Emoji Style
    • I'll Be There for You
      • Motzi-Matzah
    • Shmurah Matzah
      • Maror
    • Horseradish
    • Maror
    • Maror (Bitter Herbs) by Hanan Harchol
    • maror
      • Koreich
    • who invented the sandwhich
    • Visual Koreich
      • Shulchan Oreich
    • Let's Eat!
    • Matzah Ball Soup
    • Stump the Adults! (courtesy of Nancy Becker)
    • Just Joking: Shulchan Orech
      • Tzafun
    • Find the Afikomen!
    • Uncle Eli Afikoman
      • Bareich
    • Pouring Elijah's and Miriam's Cup (simplified for children)
    • Miriam's Cup
    • Opening the Door for Elijah
    • Barech
    • Uncle Eli - Opening the Door
    • Bareich
      • Hallel
    • Haggadah Haiku
    • Heschel on Kindness
    • Direct Contact
    • Hinei Ma Tov
    • Welcoming Others
      • Nirtzah
    • Nirtzah
    • Nirtzah
    • Chad Gadya
      • Commentary / Readings
    • Seder Table
    • Family Passover Scavanger Hunt
    • Jokes for Kids: The best clean Pesach jokes I've found
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