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Introduction
Source : Original Illustration from Haggadot.com

Introduction
Source : Internet Search

Opening Song
(Sung to the tune of "Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel")
Oh, welcome everybody.
Time to gather round.
We will tell the story.
We'll smile and then we'll frown.  
Oh Pesach, Pesach, Pesach
We were slaves but now we're free.
Oh Pesach, Pesach, Pesach
Let's tell our history!

Introduction

Share a special Seder memory

– special Passover tradition

– best moment at the old family Seder

– worst, or funniest Seder moment

Introduction
Source : BangItOut.com
The Matzah Show Humorous Bangitout.com (to the theme of "The Muppet Show") It's time to burn some chometz It's time to bless the lights It's time to start the seder, on the Matzah Show tonight It's time to put on kittels It's time to lean left, not right It's time to raise the 4 cups, on the Matzah Show tonight It's time to ask some questions It's time to leave Egypt tonight It's time to get things started on the most sensational Inspirational, celebrational, sederational This is what we call the Matzah Show!!!!! (Discussion #1: How could Kermit be a plague?)
Introduction
Source : Original Video from Haggadot.com
Introduction
Source : http://holidays.juda.com/passover-songs.shtml

There's no seder like our seder,

There's no seder I know.

Everything about it is halachic

Nothing that the Torah won't allow.

Listen how we read the whole Haggadah

It's all in Hebrew 'Cause we know how.

There's no Seder like our seder,

We tell a tale that is swell:

Moses took the people out into the heat

They baked the matzah

While on their feet

Now isn't that a story That just can't be beat?

Let's go on with the show!

Introduction
Source : http://www.reformjudaism.org/blog/2014/04/09/five-fun-facts-about-passover

We all know about Passover, that holiday when we Jews whip out our flat, cracker-like matzah, talk about the massive exodus from Egypt, and drink a whole lot of Manischewitz wine. As it happens, though, there are a few other things you might want to know about Passover! Here are some facts about the holiday that you probably never knew:

Passover is an oldie. Judaism celebrates a lot of holidays. Some are fairly recent, such as Yom Ha’atzmaut, Israeli Independence Day, founded only 66 years ago when Israel was declared a state. But the oldest of them all? Passover! The very first Passover was celebrated in Egypt itself more than 3,300 years ago and marked the first holiday the Jews ever celebrated.

The world’s biggest matzah ball was really big.You thought your mother made them well? Well she’s up against some competition. The world largest matzah ball was made in the heart of New York City in 2009. Chef Anthony Sylvestry managed to make a matzah ball measuring 22.9” wide and weighing a whopping 267 lbs!  

Sometimes there are seven foods on the seder plate. The traditional seder plate is a circular plate with six spots on it, each to hold a different symbolic food to be eaten during the Passover meal. In recent years, a new tradition has begun to form – a seder plate with seven spots instead of six. The new seventh food? An orange. The orange is said to signify fruitfulness, and the action of spitting out the seeds represents “spitting out” hate and discrimination in our communities. 

Passover is a day of commemoration.On Passover 2,000 years ago, a nation of Jews escaped Egypt through the splitting of the Red Sea. On Passover 149 years ago, Abraham Lincoln was assassinated at Ford’s Theatre in Washington, D.C. Many Jewish Americans were in synagogue at the time of the assassination, both to observe Passover and to celebrate the end of the Civil War, and the American Jewish Historical Society notes that synagogue bimahs "were quickly draped in black and, instead of Passover melodies, the congregations chanted Yom Kippur hymns." 

Nepal is home to the world’s largest Passover seder.The world’s largest Passover seder, boasting more than 1,000 participants, is held yearly in Kathmandu, Nepal. Why Nepal? The country is overflowing with young Israeli travelers who have recently finished their army service, and when it comes time for Passover, some want to be reminded of their mom’s chicken soup or experience the familiar crunch of matzah. Other attendees simply hear of this massive event and feel compelled to travel to Nepal to experience the holiday in such a unique way. Rabbis fly in to lead the seder, and tens of participants show up in advance to help prepare for the guests. Now that’s a lot of company!

Introduction
Source : http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/low_concept/2006/04/the_twominute_haggadah.html

The Two-Minute Haggadah : A Passover service for the impatient, by Michael Rubiner

Opening prayers:

Thanks, God, for creating wine. (Drink wine.)

Thanks for creating produce. (Eat parsley.)

Overview: Once we were slaves in Egypt. Now we're free. That's why we're doing this.

Four questions:
1. What's up with the matzoh?
2. What's the deal with horseradish?
3. What's with the dipping of the herbs?
4. What's this whole slouching at the table business?

Answers:
1. When we left Egypt, we were in a hurry. There was no time for making decent bread.
2. Life was bitter, like horseradish.
3. It's called symbolism.
4. Free people get to slouch.

A funny story: Once, these five rabbis talked all night, then it was morning. ( Heat soup now. )

The four kinds of children and how to deal with them:
Wise child—explain Passover.
Simple child—explain Passover slowly.
Silent child—explain Passover loudly.
Wicked child—browbeat in front of the relatives.

Speaking of children: We hid some matzoh. Whoever finds it gets five bucks.

The story of Passover: It's a long time ago. We're slaves in Egypt. Pharaoh is a nightmare. We cry out for help. God brings plagues upon the Egyptians. We escape, bake some matzoh. God parts the Red Sea. We make it through; the Egyptians aren't so lucky. We wander 40 years in the desert, eat manna, get the Torah, wind up in Israel, get a new temple, enjoy several years without being persecuted again. ( Let brisket cool now. )

The 10 Plagues: Blood, Frogs, Lice—you name it.

The singing of "Dayenu":
If God had gotten us out of Egypt and not punished our enemies, it would've been enough. If he'd punished our enemies and not parted the Red Sea, it would've been enough.

If he'd parted the Red Sea—( Remove gefilte fish from refrigerator now. )

Eat matzoh. Drink more wine. Slouch.

Thanks again, God, for everything. SERVE MEAL.

Introduction
Source : Original

The Sorting Hat of Passover

                        You might belong in Gryffindor where dwell the brave at heart.  They forge the path for those to come with justice, tzedek, from the start!

You might belong in Hufflepuff where they are just and loyal.  Those patient ‘Puffs are true and unafraid of Middle Eastern turmoil!

Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw if you’ve a ready mind.  Where those of wit and learning will always find chevruta in kind.

Or perhaps in Slytherin you’ll make your real friends.  Those cunning folks use any sources to achieve their Talmudic ends.

Though I must fulfill my duty and must divide the table every year; still I wonder whether sorting may not bring the end I fear.  Oh, know the Bible, read the Siddur, the warning with which history is fraught.  For our Seder is in danger from external deadly thought!  And we must stay united or we’ll crumble from within; I have told you, I have warned you, let the Jewish learning begin!

Introduction
Source : http://www.theholidayspot.com/passover/jokes_for_passover.htm

A little boy once returned home from Hebrewschooland his father asked, "what did youlearntoday?"
He answered, "The Rabbi told us how Moses led thechildrenof Israel out of Egypt."
"How?"
The boy said "Moses was a big strong man and he beat Pharaoh up. Then while he was down, he got all the people together and ran towards the sea. When he got there, he has the Corps of Engineers build a huge pontoon bridge. Once they got on the other side, they blew up the bridge while the Egyptians were trying tocross."
The father was shocked. "Is that what the Rabbi taught you?"
The boy replied, "No. But you'd never believe the story he DID tell us!"
Read more athttp://www.theholidayspot.com/passover/jokes_for_passover.htm#EtDVy1F7ivCAYf8y.99

Introduction
Source : original

Hametz is made from one of these five grains.

WHEAT

RYE

SPELT

OATS

BARLEY

Matza MUST be made from one of these five grains.  From the moment that water touches the flour made of these grains, the matza must be rolled out and baked within 18 minutes.

Introduction
Source : original

Kitniyot literally means small things.  They include rice, corn, lentils, beans and peanuts.  At soime point in the Middle Ages, Ashkenazi Jews stopped eating kitniyot during Pesach.  

Conservative and Orthodox Rabbis in Israel have permitted eating kitniyot, as have some Conservative Rabbis in the United States.  Nevertheless, it remains a wide-spread custom within Ashkenazi Jewry to avoid kitniyot during Pesach.  

Introduction
Source : Rabbi Rocketpower and the Half-Baked Matzah Mystery - A Particularly Peculiar Passover by Rabbi Susan Abramson

A cartoon history of Passover, from the introduction to Rabbi Rocketpower and the Half-Baked Matzah Mystery - A Particularly Peculiar Passover by Rabbi Susan Abramson. http://amzn.to/YsrXy4

Introduction
Source : http://0.tqn.com/d/homeschooling/1/0/o/T/passovercross.png
Introduction
Source : Original

Moishe House (www.moishehouse.org) worked with educators from JewishLearning.com to create this awesome quick guide to your seder plate!

Kadesh
Source : Design by Haggadot.com

Kadesh
Source : http://holidays.juda.com/passover-songs.shtml

Take Us out of Egypt (sung to the tune of Take me out to the ball game")

Take us out of Egpyt

Free us from slavery

Bake us some matzah in a haste

Don't worry 'bout flavor--Give no thought to taste.

Oh it's rush, rush, rush, to the Red Sea

If we don't cross it's a shame

For it's ten plagues, Down and you're out

At the Pessah history game.

Urchatz
Source : Original Illustration from Haggadot.com
Karpas
Source : Made It Myself Books
Karpas
Source : Design by Haggadot.com

Yachatz
Source : Design by Haggadot.com

Yachatz
Source : Original

We break the middle matzah spiriting away a part of the tribes of Israel to be lost until found at the end of proceedings.  What does this feel like, to rip at a part of our Jewish souls to leave them in hiding? 

Yachatz
Maggid - Beginning
Source : Rabbi Daniel Brenner, www.rabbidanielbrenner.blogspot.com

Here is a kid and adult friendly alternative to for the Maggid section (the Passover story section) of the Haggadah. This short play is in the style of "sedra scenes" -- a contemporary take which makes the story current but stays true to the Exodus narrative. I've written it for large crowds -- so there are 13 parts, but if you have a smaller gathering you can easily double up.

LET MY PEOPLE GO!
A short play for the seder

CAST: NARRATOR, JOSEPH, BENJAMIN, PHAROAH, ADVISOR, HEBREW 1, HEBREW 2, HEBREW 3, BOSS, BAT PHAROAH, MOSES, GOD, AARON (13 parts)

NARRATOR: Our story begins in the land of Egypt where Joseph, once a prisoner, is now the Pharaoh’s chief advisor.

JOSEPH: So how are things back in Israel?

BENJAMIN: Oy! Terrible. Our gardens and crops are dying. There is no rain this year. That is why we had to come down to Egypt!

JOSEPH: Well, don’t worry..life in Egypt is fantastic. Playstation 3 in every house, High Definition Television, Lincoln Navigators in the driveway, This is the most powerful nation on the planet!

BENJAMIN: Did you have rain this year? Are the gardens and crops doing well?

JOSEPH: We don’t have to worry about that. I’ve stored away tons of food in giant warehouses. The Pharaoh will be able to feed the people for three years at least, even if we get no rain.

BENJAMIN: What does the Pharaoh think of us Hebrews?

JOSEPH: He loves me. He welcomes the Hebrews into his land. Bring the entire family, we’ll make a great life here.

Narrator: The Hebrews all moved to Egypt and had many children and lived a successful life. But after many years, after Joseph and his brothers had died, a new Pharaoh rose to power.

PHAROAH: Advisor, bring me the latest census report. I want to know all the people who I rule over!

ADVISOR: Yes, you’re Royal Highness. I have the numbers here.

PHAROAH: Let’s see..Nubians, Midians, yes, very good. Are there really that many Hebrews?

ADVISOR: Oh yes, your highness. They are growing in number. They are very strong workers.

PHAROAH: Do you think that might be a danger? Perhaps they will challenge my rule – make demands. You know how these workers are always complaining about the size of the rocks for the new Pyramids. I am worried that they will use their strength in numbers to rise up against me!

ADVISOR: Yes, you are right, we must do something to break their spirits.

PHAROAH: First, let us begin with something small. We’ll get them to make more bricks each day. If that doesn’t work, we’ll eliminate the fifteen-minute breaks. If that doesn’t break them, then maybe we’ll turn to harsher measures.

Narrator: The Hebrew workers struggled to keep up with Pharaoh’s demands.

HEBREW 1: My hands are killing me. And my back, oy! I can’t take this pace.

HEBREW 2: We can make a thousand bricks a day—but two thousand? No team can work that hard! We’ll fall over!

HEBREW 3: Get back to work, the boss is coming!

BOSS: Efficiency, people! We have got to make 900 more bricks by sundown! Come on, let’s work faster!

HEBREW 1: We are working as fast as we can, boss.

BOSS: Listen, smart aleck, I’ve got a lot of pressure on my shoulders. If Pharaoh doesn’t get his bricks, I’m out of a job. I got a family to feed, too, you know. So get back down in the pit and start working!

HEBREW 2: We haven’t had a break all day!

BOSS: And you are not going to get one! Work!

HEBREW 3: You know what, boss; you have become a real pain in the backside!

BOSS: What’d you say?

HEBREW 3: You heard me.

[The BOSS walks over and pushes Hebrew 3 to the ground]

BOSS: Now get back to work before I get really angry!

Narrator: Meanwhile, Pharaoh’s daughter adopted a young Hebrew child. The child, Moses, was raised with the finest Egypt had to offer.

BAT PHAROAH: Here, sweetheart, eat your honey cakes before your flute lesson.

MOSES: I’m so excited about the party this evening.

BAT PHAROAH: Your new robe looks lovely, dear. I just hope that the Pyramid is finished. Your grandfather has the workers working double time just to get the place finished before the great assembly.

MOSES: I heard that the Hebrews were complaining.

BAT PHAROAH: Complaining? Don’t worry about that. We take care of the needs of all our workers, dear. They are fed, given homes, and we give them a new pair of shoes each year. We are very generous. The only problem is that there are simply too many Hebrews. For that reason, we are cutting down their number. I know that it is sad that we have to kill off their baby boys, but we are really doing it for their own good.

MOSES: I know so little about the world. Someday I’d like to go out of the palace and see how they live.

BAT PHAROAH: They are not clean like us, dear. Especially the Hebrews. They throw garbage on the streets, and the smells are truly horrible.

Narrator: One day Moses decides to sneak out of the palace, and see for himself the plight of the Hebrews.

HEBREW 1: I can’t work, today, I’m sick! And I hurt my arm yesterday lifting stones!

BOSS: I don’t want to hear excuses. This pyramid has got to be finished by Thursday! Today is Wednesday! So get moving!

HEBREW 1: I can’t work. Please, listen to me, have some compassion!

HEBREW 2: Give him a break, boss!

BOSS: Shut up!

HEBREW 3: Don’t get involved!

HEBREW 2: I’m tired of this, boss! My cousin there is hurt. He can’t work today. And he’s not working. So go tell Pharaoh that he’ll have to hire some more workers or this isn’t getting done!

BOSS: Shut up!

[Boss pushes Hebrew 2 to the ground.]

HEBREW 1: Stop it!

BOSS: I’m going to hurt you bad, you whiny Hebrew!

HEBREW 3: Stop! One of Pharaoh’s princes is coming!

MOSES: What is happening?

BOSS: I am going to give this man the beating he deserves, your honor! Watch this!

MOSES: No!

[Moses hits the Boss, who falls to the ground]

HEBREW 3: Oh no! What did you do to the boss? We’ll be blamed for this! We’ll be punished!

MOSES: What have I done? What have I done?

Narrator: Moses ran away, far off into the wilderness. Where he is taken in by Yitro, and marries one of Yitro’s daughter’s Zipporah. One day, as Moses is taking care of yitro’s sheep, he stumbles across a burning bush.

GOD: Moses, Moses!

MOSES: Who is that? What is going on? What is happening?

GOD: It is me, the God of your ancestors, Abraham, Issac, and Jacob.

MOSES: You must have the wrong number.

GOD: This is no time for jokes. You must go back to Egypt and stand up to Pharaoh! Then you will lead the people back to their homeland!

MOSES: How will I do that? The people do not know me! I have no power now that I have run away!

GOD: I will be with you. Go to your sister, Miriam, and brother, Aaron, and stand up to Pharaoh!

Narrator: Moses returns to Egypt, with his wife and son, Gershom. Aaron and Moses approach Pharaoh.

PHAROAH: What do you want?

AARON: Our people need a three-day vacation. We need to go outside of the city so that we can pray to God in our own way.

PHAROAH: Why can’t you wait for the festival of the pyramids? Then your people will have a chance to celebrate with everyone.

MOSES: We do not wish to pray to your gods. We have one God, who is mightier than all of your gods.

PHAROAH: You must be joking. The gods have made Egypt a great nation. What has your God done for you?

MOSES: You’ll see what our God can do! And then you’ll give in to our demands!

PHAROAH: Don’t count on it, Hebrew!

Narrator: Pharaoh was a stubborn man. Even after plagues of blood, frogs, lice, disease, hail, and darkness, he would not let the Hebrews take a day off. It wasn’t until a disease struck and killed the first born of every Egyptian, that the Pharaoh changed his mind.

PHAROAH: Don’t you understand what is happening?

ADVISOR: No, your highness, I don’t know why our gods are not protecting us.

PHAROAH: Everything we did to the Hebrews is now happening to us!!!

ADVISOR: Maybe their God is powerful!

PHAROAH: Tell the police that are surrounding their neighborhood to let them go.

Narrator: That night, Moses, spoke to the people.

MOSES: Put on your sandals, we will not have time to bake the bread for tomorrow! Tonight we will leave Egypt, and set out for a new land! Our children, and our children’s children will remember this night! They will tell the story of how we stood up to Pharaoh, and how God helped us to be free!

AARON: Let all who are hungry come and eat!

Narrator: And thus ends our little play.

Maggid - Beginning
Source : Dr Maurice M. Mizrahi, Fort Belvoir Congregation, Virginia

The Jews in Egypt had a peculiar local custom. Each participant would sling the napkin containing the matzah over their right shoulder. Then the leader of the seder would ask them "Where are you from?", and they would answer "Mitzrayim -- Egypt". The leader would then ask again, "And where are you going?". They would then sling the napkin of matzah over their left shoulder and answer: "Yerushalayim -- Jerusalem!".

In some families, the leader would take the seder tray and go around chanting and lightly banging the tray over each of the participant's heads! Some say this is to place each person under the "protection" symbolized by the seder plate. Each person was "passed over", as it were!

Maggid - Beginning
Source : http://www.jr.co.il/humor/pass01.txt

A Passover Song [Sung to the tune of "These are a few of my favorite things"]

Cleaning and cooking and so many dishes

Out with the hametz, no pasta, no knishes

These are a few of our Passover things.

When the plagues strike

When the lice bite

When we're feeling sad We simply remember our Passover things And then we don't feel so bad.

Matzoh and karpas and chopped up haroset Shankbones and Kiddish and Yiddish neuroses Tante who kvetches and uncle who sings These are a few of our Passover things.

When the plagues strike When the lice bite When we're feeling sad We simply remember our Passover things And then we don't feel so bad.

Motzi and maror and trouble with Pharoahs Famines and locusts and slaves with wheelbarrows Matzoh balls floating and eggshell that cling These are a few of our Passover things.

When the plagues strike When the lice bite When we're feeling sad We simply remember our Passover things And then we don't feel so bad.

Maggid - Beginning
Source : Original

This was my first attempt at creating video content for our Seder. This provides the introduction to our story, as the Jewdonians are enslaved by the evil people of the planent Egyptonia.

-- Four Questions
Source : Original by Heidi Aycock

On all other nights, we get biscuits and rolls,
Fluffy and puffy and full of air holes.
Why on this night, why, tell me why,
Only this flat stuff that’s always so dry.

On all other nights, we eat all kinds of greens,
And I’m starting to like them – except lima beans.
Why on this night, I ask on my knees,
Do we eat stuff so bitter it makes grownups wheeze?

On all other nights, we dip vegies just once –
Just try dipping twice and they’ll call you a dunce.
Why on this night, why, tell me true,
Why double-dipping’s the right thing to do.

On all other nights, we sit up when we munch.
You’ll choke if you slump! You’ll croak if you hunch!
Why on this night, if anyone knows,
Do we get to recline on my mom’s good pillows.

Why is this night so different from most?
Why do we do things so odd and so gross?
Why do we tell the same stories and stuff?
Because when it’s Pesach, it’s never enough!

-- Four Questions
Source : www.acs.ucalgary.ca/~elsegal/Uncle_Eli/Eli.html

The Four Questions

Why is it only
on Passover night
we never know how
to do anything right?
We don't eat our meals
in the regular ways,
the ways that we do
on all other days.

'Cause on all other nights
we may eat
all kinds of wonderful
good bready treats,
like big purple pizza
that tastes like a pickle,
crumbly crackers
and pink pumpernickel,
sassafras sandwich
and tiger on rye,
fifty felafels in pita,
fresh-fried,
with peanut-butter
and tangerine sauce
spread onto each side
up-and-down, then across,
and toasted whole-wheat bread
with liver and ducks,
and crumpets and dumplings,
and bagels and lox,
and doughnuts with one hole
and doughnuts with four,
and cake with six layers
and windows and doors.
Yes--
on all other nights
we eat all kinds of bread,
but tonight of all nights
we munch matzo instead.

And on all other nights
we devour
vegetables, green things,
and bushes and flowers,
lettuce that's leafy
and candy-striped spinach,
fresh silly celery
(Have more when you're finished!)
cabbage that's flown
from the jungles of Glome
by a polka-dot bird
who can't find his way home,
daisies and roses
and inside-out grass
and artichoke hearts
that are simply first class!
Sixty asparagus tips
served in glasses
with anchovy sauce
and some sticky molasses--
But on Passover night
you would never consider
eating an herb
that wasn't all bitter.

And on all other nights
you would probably flip
if anyone asked you
how often you dip.
On some days I only dip
one Bup-Bup egg
in a teaspoon of vinegar
mixed with nutmeg,
but sometimes we take
more than ten thousand tails
of the Yakkity-birds
that are hunted in Wales,
and dip them in vats
full of Mumbegum juice.
Then we feed them to Harold,
our six-legged moose.
Or we don't dip at all!
We don't ask your advice.
So why on this night
do we have to dip twice?

And on all other nights
we can sit as we please,
on our heads, on our elbows,
our backs or our knees,
or hang by our toes
from the tail of a Glump,
or on top of a camel
with one or two humps,
with our foot on the table,
our nose on the floor,
with one ear in the window
and one out the door,
doing somersaults
over the greasy k'nishes
or dancing a jig
without breaking the dishes.
Yes--
on all other nights
you sit nicely when dining--
So why on this night
must it all be reclining?

-- Four Questions
Source : BimBam
Learn the Four Questions (aka Ma Nishtana) for Passover - whether you're the youngest child yourself or you're coaching someone else. :) Watch this short video to practice saying the words and to learn all the cool ways that seder night is different. Featuring Jason Mesches.
-- Four Children
Source : Original Illustration from Haggadot.com
-- Four Children
-- Four Children
Source : http://holidays.juda.com/passover-songs.shtml

The Ballad of the Four Sons
(to the tune of "Clementine")

wriiten by Ben Aronin in 1948

Said the father to his children,

"At the seder you will dine,

You will eat your fill of matzah,

You will drink four cups of wine."

Now this father had no daughters,

But his sons they numbered four.

One was wise and one was wicked,

One was simple and a bore.

And the fourth was sweet and winsome,

he was young and he was small.

While his brothers asked the questions

he could scarcely speak at all.

Said the wise one to his father

"Would you please explain the laws?

Of the customs of the seder

Will you please explain the cause?"

And the father proudly answered,

"As our fathers ate in speed,

Ate the paschal lamb 'ere midnight

And from slavery were freed."

So we follow their example

And 'ere midnight must complete

All the seder and we should not

After 12 remain to eat.

Then did sneer the son so wicked

"What does all this mean to you?"

And the father's voice was bitter

As his grief and anger grew.

"If you yourself don't consider

As son of Israel,

Then for you this has no meaning

You could be a slave as well."

Then the simple son said simply

"What is this," and quietly

The good father told his offspring

"We were freed from slavery."

But the youngest son was silent

For he could not ask at all.

His bright eyes were bright with wonder

As his father told him all.

My dear children, heed the lesson

and remember evermore

What the father told his children

Told his sons that numbered four.

-- Four Children
-- Four Children
Source : New American Haggadah

Some scholars believe there are four kinds of parents as well.

The Wise Parent is an utter bore. "Listen closely, because you are younger than I am," says the Wise Parent, "and I will go on and on about Jewish history, based on some foggy memories of my own religious upbringing, as well as an article in a Jewish journal I have recently skimmed." The Wise Parent must be faced with a small smile of dim interest.

The Wicked Parent tries to cram the story of our liberation into a set of narrow opinions about the world. "The Lord led us out of Egypt," the Wicked Parent says, "which is why I support a bloodthirsty foreign policy and am tired of certain types of people causing problems." The Wicked Parent should be told in a firm voice, "With a strong hand God rescued the Jews from bondage, but it was my own clumsy hand that spilled hot soup in your lap."

The Simple Parent does not grasp the concept of freedom. "There will be no macaroons until you eat all your brisket," says the Simple Parent, at a dinner honoring the liberation of oppressed peoples. "Also, stop slouching at the table." In answer to such statements, the Wise Child will roll his eyes in the direction of the ceiling and declare, "Let my people go!"

The Parent Who Is Unable to Inquire has had too much wine, and should be excused from the table.

-- Four Children
Source : Matan

The child who "doesn't know how to ask a question" is the last of the four children mentioned, as though he/she is ranked at the "bottom of the class". How do we perceive people who are different than ourselves? What would our interactions be like if we took a moment to recognize that everyone is created " b'tzelem eholhim " - in God's image - before we passed judgment? 

Asking a question and being verbal are not mutually exclusive, though too often we see them as being just that. What tools can we provide for children who need help communicating their thoughts? How can we help them formulate their questions?

What would someone miss out on about you if they formed all of their opinions within seconds of meeting you? What would you want that person to know about you? 

 

-- Four Children
Source : Matan

Is this child really simple?

Sometimes, children understand more than they are able to convey. Individuals with auditory processing difficulties or other learning disabilities, speech/language delays, anxiety and more may be perceived as "simple" when, in fact, it is the adults in their lives that are too "simple" or one-dimensional in their quest for "information output". 

Everyone learns differently. One person could be a visual learner, while another may prefer hearing information or talking it through. Still others need to learn by moving and feeling. How do you learn best? How might you discover what the "simple" child knows if you think about how he/she learns best?

How does Passover take into account all different types of learners? When do you feel most engaged in the rituals of the Seder? Do all of the people at your Seder feel the same way? What does this tell us about individual learning styles?

-- Four Children
Source : Matan

There is a function behind every behavior. What is this "wicked child" trying to tell the adults in his/her life? No child misbehaves in order to become someone's least favorite person - so what else is going on?

Are the child's basic physical needs (sleep, nutrition) being met?

Is the child overwhelmed by sensory input?

Is the child having difficulty understanding what is expected of him/her?

Do the adults' expectations match the child's current level of functioning?

Is the child trying to show you that something is too hard? Too easy?

Is the child socially successful, or the target of bullying, teasing, or simply being left out?

It is only by identifying the function behind a behavior that we can turn the "wicked" child's actions into productive, acceptable behaviors! 

-- Four Children
Source : Matan

The "wise child" comes first in our reading of the four children, as if to say this child is ranked above all others; that being wise is the attribute to which all others should aspire. But what does it mean to be wise? Does it mean that a child is "smart" only in traditional ways - i.e. he/she does very well in school?

Is this definition of "wise" too narrow?

What might we miss about the "wise child" when we think only of "book smarts" or the ability to adapt to a particular teacher's methods of instruction?

What might we miss about the other children who are not considered "wise" in this traditional way?

-- Four Children
Source : Matan
“The Four Children” provides an opportunity to talk about modern-day labels and how we think of people with varying strengths and weaknesses. Can any child really be summarized with one terse label? Can any individual be described so succinctly – wise, wicked, simple, and not knowing how to ask? Advocates for children with learning differences (or anyone with "special needs") often talk about “people-first language.” For example, we talk about a “child with autism” but not an “autistic child;” we refer to “children with learning disabilities” but not “learning disabled children.” The differences may seem slight. But we use people-first language to recognize the whole person and not identify him/her by any one ability or disability. So, too, we can think about – and discuss - the four children of the Passover seder as parts of a whole.
-- Four Children
Ugne, Vilnius, Lithuania

#globalbeitmidrash

#globalteenagershaggadah

-- Exodus Story
-- Exodus Story
-- Exodus Story
Source : Franny Silverman, for the Sh'ma Haggadah supplement

Dayenu means "it would have been enough."  And not in a kvetchy/sarcastic way!  Dayenu is a sincere expression of gratitude, of the Jewish people's cup overfloweth. 

There are many any verses in the Hebrew proclaiming how it would have been enough just to be brought out from slavery in Egpyt, to get the Torah, to be gifted Shabbat, etc...

In this version, you may sing some, all or none of the traditional verses, but then open it up so Dayenu can become a participatory song where everyone offers their own "dayenu" for the year. As in: It would have been enough if________, but also ______! Dayenu! Day-day-enu...etc...

For example:It would have been enough if I graduated high school this year, but I also got accepted to my top choice for college! Dayenu! (And everyone sings the chorus!)

This an be done at the Dayenu moment in the Seder or introduced earlier and then whenever someone is moved throughout the Seder to share their Dayenu moment, they can. Depends on the enthusiasm of the crowd. 

-- Exodus Story
Source : Frozen

Let Us Go

(sung loosely to the tune of Let it Go)

The sand burns hot in the desert tonight

The foot prints of my people can be seen

A kingdom of subjugation under Pharaoh who is mean

Our people built his temples and pyramids to the sky

Oh dear lord hear our people’s cry...

Let us go, let us go

Can’t hold us back any more

Let us go, let us go.

Find someone else to do your chores

Elohim, adoni hear us pray,

Lets pack our things

The desert never bothered us anyway

It’s funny how some distance

makes Egyptians all seems small and the masters that controlled us can’t get to us at all

It’s time to see what we can do

The power of a people who’ve broken through

Torah v emet the laws for me.

We’re free.

Let us go, let us go.

We are one with the lord

Let us go, let us go.

We hope this Seder didn’t make you bored

So here we’ll sit and here we’ll stay

Let the Seder go on

The Maror never bothers me anyway...

-- Exodus Story
Source : Original
The world's fastest haggadah for your Passover seder!
-- Exodus Story
Source : http://gadgets.gunaxin.com/passover-according-to-lego/47955

Like any story we’ve ever read, there’s also a LEGO version of it. Well, at least there is when people take the time to make one. So Gunaxin looked through Youtube and guess what we found? That’s right, a video of LEGO Passover, made by the most well-meaning people ever: Amateurs. If you’re really bored with your life, you will watch.

-- Exodus Story
Source : http://blog.ninapaley.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/MosesPartsSea324fps.gif
-- Ten Plagues
Source : Shabot6000.com
-- Ten Plagues
Source : Original Illustration from Haggadot.com
-- Ten Plagues
Source : http://www.abovetopsecret.com/forum/thread412917/pg1
The Plagues happened at the same time as a massive volcano eruption. The volcano Santorini sent ash in to the air effecting the surrounding area. The ash is found in Cairo and the Nile River, proven by testing the composition of the ash. This volcanic eruption happened between 1500-1650BC while the Plagues happened between 1400-1550BC. So it fits there. 

1st Plague. River ran red LIKE blood. But there is a common algae plume called the Red Tide. This makes the river, or any water, look red like blood. Why did this happen? The ash changes the PH level of the river allowing the algae to bloom. 

2nd Plague. Frogs. The algae is killing fish. Fish eat frog eggs. No fish, record number of frogs. Frogs can't live in polluted water and so leave the river. 

3rd and 4th Plague. Lice and flies. The translation can actually be lice, fleas, gnats, or midges. But you have riverfull of dead fish, and now dead frogs. This brings the insects of the 3rd and 4th Plague. 

5th Plague. Pestilence. Flies, dead frogs, dead fish, easy enough no? 

6th Plague. Boils. Certain types of flies that bite can leave behind boils. The bites get infected, they turn in to boils. 

7th Plague. Fire and Hail. Ash in the air causes a mixture of ash and water. The ash, very high in the air, causes the water to freeze so when it falls it is hail and not rain. The fire? I saw this amazing picture in Nat. Geo. of a volcanic eruption. There was red lightning. It was amazing to see bright red lightning. Why is it red? Chemicals in the ash makes red lightning. So fire in the sky, and hail. 

8th Plague. Locusts. Locusts come about when the ground is very damp. They bury their eggs in the sand about 4-6 inches. After record amount of hail the ground would be very wet allowing the locusts to form. 

9th Plague. Darkness. Ash in the air. After am eruption in 1815 there was darkness for 600 kilometers. After Krakatoa it was dark for even farther for days. 

10th Plague. Death of First born. In Egypt the first born was king. They would be the one to lead the family after the father died. When food was scarce the first born ate first and some times was the only one to eat. After locusts ate every thing there was only grain locked in vaults. The hail got it wet, locust feces, it made it moldy. And so when only the first born ate, they were the only ones killed by moldy grain. 

-- Ten Plagues

This is a great visual representation of the 10 plagues; I like to learn through pictures as oppose to just words because I am a visual learner

-- Cup #2 & Dayenu
Source : Orginial

We are grateful that we are together on this night as a family ~ Dayenu

We are grateful that we are together to share this moment ~ Dayenu

We are grateful that we are together, alive and healthy ~ Dayenu

We are grateful that we are able to eat together ~ Dayenu

We are grateful that we have a light shining upon us ~ Dayenu

We are grateful for everything and everyone that we have ~ Dayenu

We are grateful for all that has touched our lives ~Dayenu

We are grateful that our ancestors never gave up home, and to them we drink the second glass of wine together ~ Dayenu

-- Cup #2 & Dayenu
Source : Original
If God had only set us free,

Redeemed us all from slavery,

That would have been enough for me!

Dayenu...

If God had given us Shabbat,

That really would have meant a lot,

But did God stop there?

No, God did not!

Dayenu...

God's Torah we were also given,

And the Promised Land to live in,

For all these things our thanks are given.

Dayenu...

-- Cup #2 & Dayenu
Source : BimBam
Day dayenu day dayenu! It's the best loved song from the Passover Seder and now you and your friends and family can learn the tune and a few verses with Jason Mesches. Practice up with this karaoke video and have a great Pesach!
Rachtzah
Source : Design by Haggadot.com
Motzi-Matzah
Source : http://www.jewishmag.com/jimmenu/passover.htm

The Enchanted Matzoh

By Arthur R. Pell

The matzos, all freshly baked, were packed neatly in their box, waiting for the seder. Most of them were quietly awaiting their fate. They didn't mind being eaten because they were baked especially for that purpose and it never entered their minds to expect anything else.

But one little matzoh was different, perhaps the baker had made a mistake when he mixed the dough or perhaps this matzoh was enchanted. He didn't want to be eaten.

"I'm going to run away," he told the others in his box.

"Nonsense," said his friend. "You have no legs so you cannot run. and anyway you were made to be eaten. We should be happy that we are part of the great feast of Passover."

"Not I," said the enchanted matzoh, "I want to see the world."

Just then the box was removed from the shelf. A voice that sounded like thunder to the matzos said, "Let's open the box of matzos now."

It was Mom getting everything ready for the big night. The children were helping. Brother lifted the box off the shelf and carefully opened it.

The matzos all blinked when the light hit them, but no one said a word. Matzos know better than to talk when humans are around.

"Let me pick the three for the seder plate," said Sister.

She picked three matzos and wrapped them tidily in the matzoh cover, but what she didn't know was that the one in the middle was the enchanted matzoh.

Later when grandma and grandpa, the aunts, uncles and cousins arrived, they all sat down at the dining room table to partake in the Seder.

Just then, Pup came barking into the room. He wanted to share the Seder too.

Dad laughed, but told Pup that this was a serious feast and there was no place for a dog in it. Brother picked up Pup and put him out in the back yard.

Now the Seder began. Dad sang the Kiddush and made the blessing over the matzos. He then took the middle matzoh, wrapped it carefully in a napkin, and went into another room to hide it. This was the afikomen. The children tried hard not to peek. They knew that the one who found it later in the evening would get a nice prize.

Dad had hidden the enchanted matzoh on the bedroom windowsill behind the venetian blind. In his rush to hide it and get back to the table, he hadn't noticed that the window behind the blind was open.

The enchanted matzoh noticed it and said, "Good, here is my chance to run away and see the world."
He slowly inched along the windowsill, pushed himself closer and closer to the edge. He held his breath---- and jumped.

He fell down and down and down. "Oh my," he cried. I'm going to break into a million pieces."

Suddenly he stopped falling. Luckily the ground under the window was soft and covered with grass. That, plus the protection of the napkin in which he was wrapped, prevented him from being broken.

The matzoh looked around. All he could see was the darkness of the night. "The world is not so nice," he thought.

He tried to move, but as he had no legs, he could only push himself along very slowly. Suddenly he felt himself being sniffed and pushed by a wet nose.

"What is this?" he cried. "Am I to be eaten after all by this beast?"

Meanwhile the Seder was coming slowly to the end of the meal.

"Now," said Dad, "the children will look for the afikomen. The child who finds it will win a big box of chocolate matzos.

Brother and Sister and all the cousins left the table and swarmed all over the house looking for the hidden matzoh. Soon they all returned to the table disappointed.

Nobody had found the afikomen.

Dad was puzzled, but as it was getting late, he suggested that the Seder continue and the children could look again after the service ended.

Now it was time for Elijah's visit. An extra cup of wine is always placed on the Seder table for the prophet, Elijah. After the Seder meal, the door of the house is opened to welcome Elijah's spirit.

Sister went to the door and opened it. As she returned to her seat, Dad told the story of Elijah. As he said the words, "We now welcome Elijah," in through the door walked Pup and in his mouth was the missing matzoh.

Pup dropped it in front of Dad and wagged his tail. Dad laughed and said. "Yes, Pup, you found the afikomen so you win the prize. But as chocolate matzos are not good for you, we'll give you a nice bone and all the children will share the candy."

When the service ended the children ate the chocolate matzos for dessert.

In the excitement everybody forgot about the enchanted matzoh. Nobody ate it. When Mom found it in its napkin, she put it aside. "There's something special about this matzoh," she said. It's best we keep it for good luck."

Motzi-Matzah
Source : chabad jhb

"Hi! I'm your friendly, hand-made Shmurah Matzah.

The first thing you'll notice about me is that unlike other rnatzahs I'm not a square - I am round (only a Tallit needs four corners) without rough edges and hard-to-get-around comers. I'm nice and friendly. What's more, I'm the real thing, genuine. Shmurah means watched and from the moment the wheat in me was harvested, it was under constant surveillance, never to come in contact with water, chometz or any other harmful elements.

The most beautiful thing about me, though, is that I'm hand-made. No big, noisy machines have flattened me out. I am handled with tender, loving care by nice Jewish people who make me and bake me especially for Pesach.

When you baked me with your own hands, you identified with thousands of years of Jewish Heritage. Jews in every generation, in every corner of the world, since the time we left Egypt, have always made matzohs this way.

When you eat me, you taste the flavor of Jewish history. True, you'll remember the pain and the suffering, the slavery and exile, but you'll also relive the miracle of Jewish survival.

Yes, I am the Bread of Affliction; but, as we say in the Haggadah at the Seder: 'This year - slaves, next year -freemen. This year we are here; next year may we be in the land of Israel; next year in Jerusalem."

Masha Lipsker Johannesburg, South Africa 

Motzi-Matzah
Source : www.notesfromthetribe.com

It's lunchtime.

Matzah, gefilte fish, and Leben. 

Again.

Immediately you feel a pair of eyes.

Between bites of his footlong turkey on jalapeno cheddar, your co worker inquires:

'What is that?'

'It's fish….sort of….'

'No! No! that white cracker thing….'

You break off a small piece without hesitation and hand it over.

He chews it slowly.

He lights up.

'Hey! That stuff isn't bad!!!'

Try eating it for eight days, you think.

Maror
Source : Original Illustration from Haggadot.com
Maror
Source : Design by Haggadot.com

Maror
Source : http://jewishfoodforthought.com/
This animation was created for the project Projecting Freedom: Cinematic Interpretations of the Haggadah. Special thanks to project director Rabbi Leon Morris and curator Saul Robbins. More at www.ProjectingFreedom.org and http://jewishfoodforthought.com/
Maror

Maror is a very bitter herb that we eat on passover. The reason that we eat maror on passover is because it symbolizes the feeling of bitterness that the Jews had when they were slaves in Egypt. Maror is also use full when you have a cold. It really helps to clean out you're nose. That's not why we eat mar or on Passover though. When we eat maror we dip it in charoset. The charosit symbolizes the bricks that the Jews made and used to build the pyramids. I do not know why we have to eat maror though. I personally think that the Egyptians should have to eat the maror because they were the ones that tortured the Jews while they were in Egypt. I reallly wish that we did not have to eat maror on passover but it is really important that we do. Even though we are celebrating the Jews leaving Egypt and it is really happy it is really important that we remember the pain and suffering that the Jews had when thay were slaves in Egypt. That is why It is important that we eat maror on passover even though we are celebrating a happy occasion.

Koreich
Source : http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-V4j-TOhrf2s/Ti7-O2z5tAI/AAAAAAAAPq4/qjOkAE1fIC0/s1600/food+fight.png
Koreich
Shulchan Oreich
Source : Original Illustration from Haggadot.com
Shulchan Oreich
Source : www.notesfromthetribe.com

I've added a fifth question to the seder this year:

Why is it that in any other form, this matzoh we eat is the bread of affliction which our forefathers ate when the holy one, blessed be he brought us forth with an outstretched arm from bondage in the land of egypt. But, when combined with salt, schmaltz, and chicken broth, becomes a delicious comfort food served by Jewish bubbys year round?

Shulchan Oreich
Source : Nancy Becker (Knoxville, Tennessee)

Children are asked to pose questions to an adult as they think of them during the seder :

  • If they stump the adult, they get a point.
  • Prizes are awarded according to the number of points.
Shulchan Oreich
Source : http://www.thejewishcollection.com/passoverjokes.pdf

Question: If Tarzan and Jane were Jewish, what would Cheetah be? 

A. A fur coat. 

Question: If a doctor carries a black bag and a plumber carries a toolbox, what does a mohel carry?  A: A Bris-kit!

*****

As Moses and the children of Israel were crossing the Red Sea, the children of Israel began to complain to Moses of how thirsty they were after walking so far. Unfortunately, they were not able to drink from the walls of water on either side of them, as they were made up of salt-water. 

Then, a fish from that wall of water told Moses that he and his family heard the complaints of the people, but that they through their own gills could remove the salt from the water and force it out of their mouths like a fresh water fountain for the Israelites to drink from as they walked by. 

Moses accepted this kindly fish's offer. But before the fish and his family began to help, they told Moses they had a demand. They and their descendants had to be always present at the Seder meal that would be established to commemorate the Exodus, since they had a part in the story. When Moses agreed to this, he gave them their name which remains how they are known to this very day, for he said to them, "Go Filter Fish!"

Tzafun
Source : Original Illustration from Haggadot.com
Tzafun
Source : http://www.jewishmag.com/jimmenu/passover.htm

Afikoman

 Do you know who I am?

 Have you heard of my name?

 Once you have met me, you won't be the same.

 I show up each year towards the end of the seder.

 My eye see like telescopes, ears work like radar.

 You can't ever fool me, you can't ever hide.

 Your matzah's not safe in the house or outside.

 I'm famous, fantastic! I'll tell you, in brief--

 I'm Abie, the Afikoman-thief!

 Whenever you think that it's hidden away,

 locked up in a safe, covered over in clay,

 in the ear of a rabbit, in the mouth of a whale--

 I'll find it as quick as a wag of your tail.

 Don't bother with watchers and guarders and catchers.

 I'm Abie, the great Afikoman-snatcher!

 I find Afikomans, no matter what size.

 And I won't bring them back till you give me a prize.

 I'm quick and I'm clever, I'm smart and I'm sly.

 I hunt Afikomans wherever they lie.

 In the trunk of a tree, in the nose of a rocket,

 in the depths of a five-year-old boy's messy pocket.

 You don't stand a chance. I'm beyond all belief.

 I'm Abie the Afikoman-thief!

Bareich
Source : Original

Now, we're going to take the wine/juice that we've poured and each add to Elijah's cup.

Now let's do the same from our water glasses to fill Miriam's cup.

Combining our actions together is what will help Elijah come to ourworld.

 We set an extra place for Elijah and we'll open the door and invite him in later. Miriam was Moses's sister and we honor her for how she helped Moses wich made our story possible today.

Bareich
Source : Original Illustration from Haggadot.com
Bareich
Source : Original Illustration from Haggadot.com
Bareich
Source : Original
Bareich
Source : http://www.jewishmag.com/jimmenu/passover.htm

 Opening the Door

 As the seder stretched on and I started to snore,

 my Mommy said: "Quick, now! Go open the door!"

 I didn't know who could be coming right now,

 but I stifled a yawn and I stood up somehow.

 I walked to the door and I opened it wide,

 and who do you think I saw standing outside?

 My friend Uncle Eli with his beard to the floor

 was waiting there quietly next to the door!

 His eyes were still twinkling. His smile still shone bright.

 He asked: "Are you having a good time tonight?"

 I wanted to tell him about all the fun I'd been having

 since this special night had begun.

 But just as I opened my mouth to reply,

 he was gone, disappeared, in the wink of an eye!

 And I heard my Mom calling: "Come back in right now!

 We already have welcomed in Eliyahu--

 "Eliyahu shows up at our seder tonight

 to make sure that everything's going all right.

 He'll answer the questions we can't figure out.

 He"ll solve all our problems and settle our doubts.

 He also will taste from the wine in his cup,

 and we hope that this year he will cheer us all up

 by bringing us happy and wonderful news

 of a year full of freedom in store for the Jews."

Bareich

During Bareich we say thank you to god for the meal we just ate. After (in my family) my grandparents tell stories abut their lives and how during their honeymoon lots of crazy things happened to them (they are hilarious)

Hallel
Source : Unknown

On Passover we

Opened the door for Elijah

Now our cat is gone.

Hallel
Source : Abraham Joshua Heschel Quote, Design by Haggadot.com
Hallel
Source : Wherever You Go, There You Are

We all carry around ideas and images of reality, frequently garnered from other people or from courses we have taken, books we have read, or from television, the radio, newspapers, the culture in general, which give us pictures of how things are and what is occurring. As a result, we often see our thoughts, or someone else's, instead of seeing what is right in front of us or inside of us. Often, we don't even bother to look or check how we feel because we think we already know and understand. So we can be closed to the wonder and vitality of fresh encounters. If we are not careful, we can even forget that direct contact is possible. We may lose touch with what is basic and not even know it. We can live in a dream reality of our own making without even a sense of the loss, the gulf, the unnecessary distance we place between ourselves and experience. Not knowing this, we can be all the more impoverished, spiritually and emotionally. But something wonderful and unique can occur when our contact with the world becomes direct.

Hallel
Source : http://www.lyricstime.com/shalom-jerusalem-hinei-ma-tov-behold-how-good-lyrics.html
It is traditional at this point in the seder, to sing songs of praise. This is one of my favorites for this event.

Hinei ma tov umanaim

Shevet achim gam yachad

Hinei ma tov umanaim

Shevet achim gam yachad

Behold how good and

How pleasant it is

For brothers to dwell together

Hallel
Source : Telling the Story: A Passover Haggadah Explained

There is a word in Hebrew — Teshuvah — that means return. It is an acknowledgement that there is always a chance for forgiveness, redemption and change. Our traditions teach that Passover is open to all. Everyone is welcome at this table. There is always room. Because no one is ever turned away, there is always an opportunity for a rebirth of spirit.

As a sign of hospitality to all, we open the door to our homes and symbolically invite anyone who wants to join us to come inside.

At this point, the children open the door.

Nirtzah
Source : Original

Nirtzah is the conclusion of the Seder.  It is customary at this time to say the words "L'shanah haba'ah b'yerushalayim" which means "Next year in Jerusalem".  This was the dream of Jews all over the world for the last two thousand years.  It represented the idea that maybe, next year, we will make our pilgrimmage to Zion / Israel / the Promised Land / the land of milk and honey, with Jerusalem at its centre.  This pilgrimmage was also to a spiritual place of the same name.  In modern times, this isn't so difficult.  Any of us could jump on a plane and be there tomorrow for the Pesach holiday.  But, for some of us, there is a radical disconnect between Israel as a geographical and spiritual destination.  For some of us, Israel no longer represents a place to which, spiritually, we would want to go.

Thus, for anyone who wishes to be a contemporary Jew, it is that person's responsibility to add his or her voice to efforts to make of Israel a place to which all Jews would want to go and where all peoples would be welcome.  Perhaps, one day, that will be next year.

There is a well known story in the Talmud (Makkot 24b) featuring the famous Rabbi Akiva. He was traveling to Jerusalem with Rabbi Yehoshua and Rabbi Eliezer ben Azariyah, two of his colleagues, when their pupils came and reminded them that it was time to say their prayers. Stopping on Mount Scopus, they looked towards the ruins of the Temple and saw foxes running around in the ruins. Rabbi Akiva's companions burst into tears at the sight, whereas he laughed with joy. “Why are you so happy?” asked his companions. Akiva replied that, just as the prophets foretold the destruction of Jerusalem, so had they foretold the rebuilding of it. The destruction has come to pass -- now it is time for the rebuilding.

Nirtzah
Source : Original
Commentary / Readings
Source : Original

Seder Table

by Matt Waldman and Ana Fuchs

"I'll read the poems out loud, and you guess what on the Seder table I am rhyming about!"

Matzah, Carpas, an Egg and Maror

Haroset and shank bone for marking the door

Six items there are, and as you can see

They symbolize Pesach and tell our story

...Seder Plate!

We light them on Shabbat

And sometimes when it’s not

They gleam and glow

And you must know

To be careful because they are hot!

...Candles!

From grapes do we get this drink

For Seder, it’s 4 cups, I think

Kiddush is the blessing we’ll say

Over this for our Seder today.

...Kiddush cup!

It is crunchy and flat

Because it did not rise.

This unleavened bread

Should be no surprise.

...Matzah!

Each year on Passover

We read from these books

They teach us our story

But not how to cook.

....Haggadah!

Always one extra – a seat and a cup

We leave for this person, in case he shows up!

...Cup for Elijah!

Commentary / Readings
Source : Teva Learning Alliance

PESACH SCAVENGER HUNT

Find the following Together

A seed

Water, or a sign of water

A sign of an insect

Something round

Three shades of green and two shades of soil

S sprout

Something that Miriam could have used to weave a basket for baby Moshe

A source of food

Something growing on something else

Something really cool

Something with a strong smell

Something that the Israelites would need to build a fire in the wilderness

Something soft

something that reminds you of matza

Commentary / Readings
Source : Various

 MY FAVORITE CLEAN SEDER JOKES

By Rabbi Daniel Brenner

In order to keep my kids and their cousins entertained during Pesach, I have a “Joke Bank” an envelope in which I keep the following jokes, all printed out on little slips of paper. If the kids get wild, I say, “pay attention for the next ten seconds and  you’ll get to pick a joke.” They love it. Of course many of these jokes are groaners, but, hey, they are the best the internet has to offer. 

www.rabbidanielbrenner.blogspot.com

 

Q: Why do we have an Haggadah at Passover?
A: So we can Seder right words.

 

 

A British Jew is waiting in line to be knighted by the Queen. He is to kneel in front of her and recite a sentence in Latin when she taps him on the shoulders with her sword. However, when his turn comes, he panics in the excitement of the moment and forgets the Latin. Then, thinking fast, he recites the only other sentence he knows in a foreign language, which he remembers from the Passover seder:

"Ma nishtana ha layla ha zeh mi kol ha laylot."

Puzzled, Her Majesty turns to her advisor and whispers, "Why is this knight different from all other knights?"

 

A little boy once returned home from Hebrew school and his father asked, "what did you learn today?"

He answered, "The Rabbi told us how Moses led the children of Israel out of Egypt."

"How?" 

The boy said "Moses was a big strong man and he beat Pharoah up.  Then while he was down, he got all the people together and ran towards the sea.  When he got there, he has the Corps of Engineers build a huge pontoon bridge.  Once they got on the other side, they blew up the bridge while the Egyptians were trying to cross."

The father was shocked.  "Is that what the Rabbi taught you?"

The boy replied, "No.  But you'd never beleive the story he DID tell us!"

 

As Moses and the children of Israel were crossing the Red Sea, the children of Israel began to complain to Moses of how thirsty they were after walking so far. Unfortunately, they were not able to drink from the walls of water on either side of them, as they were made up of salt-water.

Then, a fish from that wall of water told Moses that he and his family heard the complaints of the people, but that they through their own gills could remove the salt from the water and force it out of their mouths like a fresh water fountain for the Israelites to drink from as they walked by.

Moses accepted this kindly fish's offer. But before the fish and his family began to help, they told Moses they had a demand. They and their descendants had to be always present at the seder meal that would be established to commemorate the Exodus, since they had a part in the story. When Moses agreed to this, he gave them their name which remains how they are known to this very day, for he said to them, "Go Filter Fish!"

 

Knock, Knock

Who's there?

EliYa

EliYa who?

EliYaHu HaNavi

 

 

Passover Research

A group of leading medical researchers has published data indicating that Seder participants should NOT partake of both chopped liver and charoses. It seems that this combination can lead to Charoses of the Liver.

 

What kind of cheese do I eat on Pesach?

Matzo-rella

Who was the best businesswoman in the Bible?

Pharaoh's daughter, she pulled a profit out of the water.

 

The Jews are camped in front of the Red Sea. They see the Egyptian chariots approaching. Moses turns to his PR man.

Moses - "Nu, where are those boats you got us?"

PR Guy - "Boats? You didn't say nothing 'bout no boats."

Moses - "So what do you want I should do? Part the waters and we can all just walk across?"

PR Guy - "If you can swing that, I'll get you your own chapter in the Bible!"

 

 

Did you know that the horseradish root goes back in time as far as the matzoh does? The horseradish root also crossed the Red Sea with the fleeing Israelites. The Israelites were slaves at the time and only had access to a few vegetables. The hard and woody horseradish was one of them and was a household staple.
Nearly all the fleeing Israelites took horseradish with them. Moshe and Sadie, however, while gathering up their scant belongings, found to their dismay that they had run out of horseradish. Sadie immediately sent Moshe into the field to dig up a large horseradish root to take with them. However, because it was dark and everyone was running around in panic, Moshe dug up a ginger root by mistake.
After forty years in the desert, the Israelites finally entered the Promised Land – all, that is, except Moshe and Sadie. It took them forty-one years to arrive. When asked where they had been, Sadie, now grown old, shrugged her shoulders and replied, "Moshe insisted on taking an alternative root."

 

 

Moshe has been living in Poland all his life, but just before the 2nd World War, he sees big trouble coming. So he sells all his assets, converts them into gold and then melts down the gold to have five sets of false teeth made for him. He flees Poland and after much travelling, arrives at Ellis Island, New York, where he is interrogated by an immigration official who also goes through the contents of his battered suitcase.
When the official sees the 5 sets of false teeth, he asks Moshe why he has so many. Moshe replies, "As you might know, we orthodox Jews have two separate sets of dishes, one for meat and one for dairy products. However, I’m so kosher and religious that I also need to have separate sets of teeth."
The official is confused. "Well that accounts for two sets of teeth. What are the other three for?"
"Well," Moshe replies, "we ultra-Orthodox Jews also use separate dishes for Passover and I’m so observant that I need two sets of Passover teeth to go with the dishes, one for meat and one for dairy food."
The official is still confused. "You've convinced me that you're a highly religious man and I accept that you therefore need four sets of teeth. But what about the fifth set?"
"Well, to tell you the truth, mister official," replies Moshe, "every once in a while I like to eat a ham and cheese sandwich."

 

 

 

After the tenth plague, the slaying of all the Egyptian first born, the Pharaoh told Moses the Jews were free to leave Egypt. So, the Jews packed their carts with their belongings and tried to leave. The problem was, with all the dead Egyptians, the funeral homes could not handle the demand. The end result was streets littered with coffins. With the streets impassable, the Jews couldn't get there carts out of their driveways.

They complained to Moses. "We can't get out of Egypt unless you do something about these blocked streets". Moses in turn, called out to God. "Lord, please do something about this coffin problem." With all the commotion, it was hard for God to hear what Moses was saying. He thought Moses said 'Coughin" and responded by turning all the wine into cough syrup. And that is why, to this day, Jews drink Passover wine that resembles cough syrup.

 

 

What's the difference between matzoh and cardboard??
Cardboard doesn't leave crumbs in the rug!

Songs
Source : Eliana Light

Eliana Light was the first place winner of Fair Trade Judaica's song contest.

Eliana: “When we celebrate Passover, it is crucial not just to remember our own suffering, but to recognize that there is suffering and slavery still happening today. In this song, I try to give voice to the hardships of children worker’s in the cocoa fields, connect their plight to Passover, and encourage people to make conscious consumption choices to help end exploitation in manufacturing and trade. I chose B’shana Ha’baah because of its repetitive, easy melody, but also because of its hopeful message of a better, more peaceful tomorrow.”

B'shana Ha'Zeh (This Year)

Verse 1:
Long ago, king Pharaoh
when we were slaves in Egypt
made us do heavy work with no pay now we’re free, but you see
there still are those who suffer making things that we use every day!

Chorus 1:
Can we see, can we see just how good it will be when we all, when we all will be free?

Can we see, can we see just how good it will be when we all, when we all will be free?

Verse 2:
Children work in the fields
in dangerous conditions
picking most of the world’s cocoa beans All alone, far from home
They do the heavy lifting
and get hurt using harmful machines!

Chorus 2:
Do you see, do you see
our responsibility
to end war, hunger and poverty?

Do you see, do you see
just how good it will be
when we all, when we all can be free!

Verse 3:
Because once we were slaves and strangers back in Egypt

Eliana Light

It’s our duty to help and to care
for all those still enslaved
Because the Torah teaches
that all workers deserve their fair share

Chorus 3:
On this Passover night
we can join in the fight
When we buy chocolate, coffee and tea

Always think when you buy
how it got there and why
so our trade can be fair, not just free

Then we’ll see, then we’ll see just how good it will be
when we all help to end poverty

Every choice that we make
is a step we can take
to ensure that the world will be free! 

Songs
Source : Original Illustration from Haggadot.com
Songs
Source : Time of Israel
Songs
Source : BimBam

A music video about the Torah’s most famous siblings: Aaron, Miriam and Moses, and the many adventures and rivalries they share throughout the Torah.

This piece was created in four weeks by 6 families, brought together by Kevah. Since each of the families had varied backgrounds in studying Torah and were diverse in age, the group decided to take a creative approach to learning text together. The eleven kids aged 5 to 15 along with their parents – a speechwriter, studio painter, landscape architect, art photographer, museum curator, singer, programmer, professor, and several entrepreneurs – decided that they wanted to make an animated musical film about sibling relationships in the Torah.

BimBam developed several workshops for the families to learn text, write a script, paint characters, draw backgrounds, storyboard animations, and practice singing together. To cap the experience, the families lent their voices to the song at Fantasy Studios, a legendary professional recording studio.

Download the lyrics here: https://www.bimbam.com/studioberkeley/