Contributors

Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

Pennsylvania , US

Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner is an American, Conservative rabbi who invites questions from those who are Jewish, those who are part of an interfaith family and anyone interested in Judaism. He has been an instructor and adviser to inter-faith couples and those converting to Judaism for 40 years. Rabbi Lerner founded two websites for the express purposes of Kiruv: (1) In-Reach to affiliated and identified members of the Jewish community in all of its congregations, arms and institutions -at www.jewishfreeware.org and (2) Outreach to dual-faith, unaffiliated and even disaffiliated individuals and families making user-friendly Jewish materials available to one and all through the web without fee at www.foundationforfamilyeducation.org.

Moses

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(Mark Kreditor, sung to the tune of The Flintstones) Moses, he's our Moses he's the man that took us for a tour Out of, Pharoh's Egypt went the children that he soon would lure Come sit and eat matzah all week long. Listen to our prayers and to our songs of Moses he's our hero he's a really really good time, a forty year guy he's the one that set us free.

Passover Story

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(Mark Kreditor, sung to the tune of The Brady Bunch) It's a story, about baby Moses, who came floating down the river called the Nile Pharoh's Queen was there just to catch him and so he stayed a while. It's a story about Jewish builders, who were tired of building Pyramids. All of them were slaves just like their Mothers and just like their kids. Until one day big Moses talked to Big G. That's G-O-D and that spells Moses's God....

Don't Sit on the Afikoman

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(To the tune of Glory, Glory, Hallelu-kah) My Dad at every Seder breaks a Matza piece in two And hides the Afikomen half-A game for me and you Find it, hold it ransom for the Seder isn't through 'till the Afikomen's gone. Chorus: Don't sit on the Afikomen. Don't sit on the Afikomen. Don't sit on the Afikomen. Or the Meal will last all night One year Daddy hid it 'neath a pillow on a chair But just as I raced...

Moses Island

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(Mark Kreditor, sung to the tune of Gilligan's Island) Just recline right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of dreadful trip. That started with ten awful plagues brought onto Egypt, brought unto Egypt. The boss he was a Jewish man raised as a Pharaohos son. Then G-d he did come calling and soon the fun begun, soon the fun begun. More blood, such frogs, and all those bugs, Pharaoh could just barely see. The Jews were really scoring points...

The Eight Nights of Passover

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(To the tune of 'The Twelve Days”) On the first night of Passover my mother served to me 1) a matzo ball in chicken soup 2) two dipped herbs 3) three pieces of matzah 4) four cups of wine 5) five gefilte fish 6) six capons baking 7) seven eggs a boiling 8) eight briskets roastin

Morror

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(Sung to the tune of "More..") Morror is the bitterness the world has known, But in Canada we need not moan. Morror were the ghettos of across the sea, But here we habitate a land that's free. Morror on the table, we are sure and we're able to look forward to many types of joy - oh boy-oi-oi-oi... Morror is the bitter herb upon our plate, And if we were sober we would palitate Morror is the answer for the schnorer,...

Haggadah Wash That Man Right Out of my Hair

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

Hagadah wash that man right out of my hair Because he's full of chometz but he doesn't care. That it's a custom now to be rid of that snare, I'll send him on his way. Haggadah drink my wine and feel real free, Haggadah eat charosez, matzah and tea, Haggadah keep the seder, with joy and glee. I really love that day!! He doesn't like gefilte fish, eat it up, eat it up. He doesn't like the matzah dish Heat it...

The Ballad of Mo Amramson

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(sung to the tune of "The Ballad of Jed Clampett") Come and listen to a story 'bout a man named Mo, His people they were slaves to the evil Pharoah, Until one day he was lookin' at a bush, And he heard the voice of God, though he wasn't a lush--- The LORD, that is, I AM, The Big G. Next thing you know, Mo's talkin' to Pharoah, Mo says, "God said you gotta let my people go!" But the king...

Tonight

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(To the tune of "Tonight," from West Side Story, By Rabbi Dan Liben Passover, 2000) Tonight, tonight, We'll tell a tale tonight, Of Pharoah, Slaves and God's awesome might; We'll do it right, with matzah, and maror and four children: -dull, wicked- and bright! Tonight, we'll tell our people's story, The "genut" and then the glory, And how it came out right.. And when we're through You'll know you've been freed too On this Saaay-der night! Tonight, tonight, we'll drink four...

It Made Them Mad

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(To the tune of “Clementine”) It made them mad to hear the answer Pharaoh would not let them go. God would help them with a signal Mighty power God would show. No, no, no, no, no, no, no That was all that Pharaoh said. With no way to beat his army, They would change his mind instead. Every time bad things got started He would almost let them go; But as soon as things got better, He would switch and tell...

Our Passover Things

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(To be sung to the tune of "My Favorite Things" from the "Sound of Music") Cleaning and cooking and so many dishes Out with the chametz, no pasta, no knishes Fish that's gefilted, horseradish that stings These are a few of our Passover things. Matzah and karpas and chopped up charoset Shankbones and kiddish and yiddish neuroses Tante who kvetches and uncle who sings These are a few of our Passover things. Motzi and moror and trouble with Pharaohs Famines and...

Plagues

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(To the tune of “She’ll Be Coming ‘Round the Mountain”) Bad things will come to Egypt, don’t you know? Bad things will come to Egypt, don’t you know? Bad things will come to Egypt, Bad things will come to Egypt, Bad things will come to Egypt, till we go God will give you this last chance to let us go; God will give you this last chance to let us go; As midnight passes by –y All your firstborn sons will...

Pharoah's Lament

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(To the tune of “The Itsy-Bitsy Spider”) My river and my sun gods have always helped me rule. Down came the plagues And folks think I’m a fool. Up come the slaves’ God And tells me what to do. I’m a roughy-toughy Pharaoh. Why won’t my gods come through

Pharoah Doesn't Pay

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(To the tune of “I’ve Been Working on the Railroad”) I’ve been working on these buildings; Pharaoh doesn’t pay. I’ve been doing what he tells me Like making bricks from clay. Can’t you hear the master calling, “Hurry up, make a brick!” Can’t you feel the master hurt me Until I’m feeling sick. Oh is this a mess, Oh is this a mess, Oh is this a mess, for Jews, for Jews. Oh is this a mess, Oh is this a...

The Ballad of the Four Sons

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(to the tune of "Clementine") Said the father to his children, "At the seder you will dine, You will eat your fill of matzoh, You will drink four cups of wine." Now this father had no daughters, But his sons they numbered four. One was wise and one was wicked, One was simple and a bore. And the fourth was sweet and winsome, he was young and he was small. While his brothers asked the questions he could scarcely speak at...

Same Time Next Year

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(to the tune of "Makin' Whoopee") Another Pesach, another year, The family seder with near and dear... Our faces shining, All thoughts of dining Are put on hold now. We hear four questions, The answer given Recalls the Jews from Egypt driven. The ch'rain is bitter, (charoset better!) Please pass the matzah. Why is this evening different From all the other nights? This year the Jews all over Are free to perform the rites. A gorgeous dinner--who can deny it-- Won't...

Just a Tad of Charoset

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(to the tune of "Just a spoon full of sugar") Chorus: Just a tad of charoset helps the bitter herbs go down, The bitter herbs go down, the bitter herbs go down. Just a tad of charoset helps the bitter herbs go down, In the most disguising way. Oh, back in Egypt long ago, The Jews were slaves under Pharaoh. They sweat and toiled and labored through the day. So when we gather Pesach night, We do what we think right....

Les Miselijah

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

(to the tune of "Do you hear the people Sing" from “Les Miserables”) Do you hear the doorbell ring, And it's a little after ten? It can only be Elijah Come to take a sip again. He is feeling pretty fine But in his head a screw is loose. So perhaps instead of wine We should only give him juice

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Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner's Haggadah

Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner's Haggadah

by Rabbi Barry Dov Lerner

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