Seder Guests...

Haggadah Section: Introduction
ComedyEntertainmentSongs

Seder Guests

To the tune of “Matchmaker”

Seder guests, seder guests lend me your ear

We’ve all arrived

Another year

Seder guests, seder guests look in your book

Tonight we drink wine, not beer.

For Papa, please pay attention

For Mama, get through all of the steps.

For me, well, I wouldn’t mention

If matzah ball soup was just all we get

Seder guests, seder guests, mah nishtanah?

Let us find out

What Israelites saw.

We tell the story to the little ones…

So…let’s do Kadesh

Next step urchatz

When do we eat?

That parts the best

Our seder has now begun!

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Table of contents
    Introduction
  • Passover 2020 Introduction
  • Seder Guests...
  • The Seder Plate - Coloring Page
  • Jerry Seinfeld's Passover Stand-Up Introduction - The Yada Yada Haggadah
  • Blessing on Flowers
  • A Secular Humanistic Passover Blessing
  • Phrases
  • Greetings
  • Building Your Mental Health Passover Seder Plate
  • A Poem For The Disappointed
  • Passover Themes Meaningful to Interfaith Families
    • Commentary / Readings
  • 20 Table Topics for Your Passover Seder
  • The Ethical Problem of Hardening Pharaoh's Heart
  • Anne Frank Quote
  • A "Fifth" Cup for Justice
    • Kadesh
  • Why Four Cups of Wine
  • Kaddesh
  • Sanctification - Kiddush
    • Urchatz
  • 2020 Seder Order
  • Blessing For Hand Washing During a Pandemic
  • Hand Washing Coloring Page
  • A Priestess’s Prayer Under Quarantine
    • Karpas
  • Karpas - The Yada Yada Haggadah
  • SALT WATER SUFFERING
    • Yachatz
  • Afikoman Auction
  • The Strangers in Our Midst
  • The Afflicted Matza
  • Song - Don't sit on the Afikomen
    • Maggid - Beginning
  • Michael Walzer, Exodus and Revolution
  • A Historical Perspective
  • Healthy Debate: How This Night Can Be Different
    • -- Four Questions
  • Hunger Seder: Four Questions
  • Four Questions
  • Four Questions in Judeo-Persian/Farsi (Transliterated)
    • -- Four Children
  • The Four Adults
  • Why This Night: Four Children and Five Rabbis
  • The Four Children Approach the Future
    • -- Exodus Story
  • Personal Mitzrayim
  • Donald Trump Tells The Exodus Story - The Trump Passover Haggadah
  • Let My People Go (song)
  • First Proposed Seal of the United States
    • -- Ten Plagues
  • Skit - Pharaoh and Moses Go To A Conflict Counselor
  • The Modern Plagues
  • Dom, Dom
    • -- Cup #2 & Dayenu
  • Dayenu
  • Maroon 5/Adam Levine - "Memories (The 2nd Cup Parody Song)"
  • Dayenu for a pandemic
    • Rachtzah
  • Rachtzah: A Deeper Washing
  • Barriers to Love
  • Bring, Deliver, Redeem, Take: Principles of Adulthood
    • Motzi-Matzah
  • No Pasta more Matzah
  • An Ode to Bread
    • Maror
  • Have Yourself a Piece of Bitter Maror
    • Koreich
  • Charoset Chanina (“Charoset of Clemency”)
    • Songs
  • Sweet Charoset - parody song
  • Our Passover Things (Sung to the tune of "My Favorite Things")
    • Shulchan Oreich
  • Let's Eat!
  • If It Ain't Broke...
    • Bareich
  • Barech – Invitation to Gratitude
  • Ruth's Cup: A New Passover Ritual Celebrating Jewish Diversity
  • Miriam's Cup by Miriam Jerris
    • Hallel
  • Welcoming Others
  • Adrienne Rich on Freedom
  • The Promised Land
    • Conclusion
  • Just to be is a blessing...
  • Conclusion
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