{ "clip_details": { "clip": { "is_admin": 0, "is_owner": 0, "handle": "monty-python-and-egyptian-self-eviction", "title": "Monty Python and The Egyptian Self-Eviction", "author": "Tessa Shlaer", "author_handle": "tessa-shlaer", "author_initials": "TS", "covertext": "Scene 1: In the Desert Moses is galloping (skipping on foot while clopping coconuts together to sound like hoofbeats) a...", "user_image": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/conversions/profile10204145413411958-thumb.jpg", "user_image_original": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/profile10204145413411958", "body": "<p><strong>Scene 1: In the Desert </strong></p>\n\n<p>Moses is galloping (skipping on foot while clopping coconuts together to sound like hoofbeats) across the desert. He comes to a burning bush.</p>\n\n<p>Bush: Halt! Who goes there!</p>\n\n<p>Moses: A shrubbery! A talking shrubbery! One that looks nice, but is not too expensive. It is a good shrubbery. I like the laurels particularly.</p>\n\n<p>Bush: Moses! Moses, Leader of the Israelites!</p>\n\n<p>(Moses looks stunned, drops to his knees in awe and bows his head to the ground in front of the burning bush.)</p>\n\n<p>Bush: Oh, don't grovel! If there's one thing I can't stand, it's people groveling.</p>\n\n<p>Moses: Sorry--</p>\n\n<p>Bush: And don't apologize. Every time I try to talk to someone, it's \"sorry this\" and \"forgive me that\" and \"I'm not worthy\". What are you doing now!?</p>\n\n<p>Moses: I'm averting my eyes, oh Lord.</p>\n\n<p>Bush: Well, don't. It's like those miserable Psalms -- they're so depressing. Now knock it off.</p>\n\n<p>Moses: Yes, Lord.</p>\n\n<p>Bush: Right! Moses, leader of the Israelites your people shall have a task to make them an example in these dark times.</p>\n\n<p>Moses: Good idea, Lord!</p>\n\n<p>Bush: Of course it's a good idea! Behold! This is your task to deliver the Israelites from bondage in Egypt.</p>\n\n<p>Moses: A blessing! But are you sure I shouldn't deliver a pizza instead</p>\n\n<p><strong>Scene 2: In Egypt </strong></p>\n\n<p>Moses: I never wanted to do this job of deliverance in the first place. At least delivering pizzas pays good tips! I wanted to be a lumberjack, even though its a bit hard doing that in the desert.</p>\n\n<p>(Israelites sing) Oh, we're Egyptian slaves. It's not OK. We work all night and we work all day. We quarry blocks and make mud bricks And want to run away!</p>\n\n<p><strong>Scene 3: Asking Pharaoh to leave</strong></p>\n\n<p>Moses approaches Pharaoh and his advisors to ask for permission for the Israelites to leave Egypt.</p>\n\n<p>Pharaoh and his advisors say, \"Ni! We are the keepers of the sacred words: Ni, Ping, and Neeee-wommmm! We want a shrubbery!!!\"</p>\n\n<p>Moses says, \"I already found a shrubbery in the desert. It told me it was God, and told me to deliver the Israelites from bondage in Egypt.\"</p>\n\n<p>When Pharaoh asks for proof that Moses speaks for God, he shows Pharaoh the holy hand grenade and Aaron pulls the holy pin, making mincemeat of half the advisors.</p>\n\n<p><strong>Scene 4: The Ten Plagues</strong></p>\n\n<p>Killer rabbits.</p>\n\n<p>Dead parrots.</p>\n\n<p>The Spanish Inquisition.</p>\n\n<p>Silly walks.</p>\n\n<p>1000-ton weights.</p>\n\n<p>Plague six. There IS no plague six!</p>\n\n<p>Crunchy frogs.</p>\n\n<p>Spam.</p>\n\n<p>Giant badgers.</p>\n\n<p>The killing of the first born.</p>\n\n<p>The morning after the final plague, the Egyptian garbage collectors roam the streets calling, \"Bring out your dead!\" People bring corpses of plague victims to the dead cart.</p>\n\n<p>When they start to pick up one body, one of the collectors says, \"Wait a bit. He's not dead. He's just resting.\" A lightning bolt comes out of the sky, hitting the body and killing it. The collectors smile and heave it onto the cart.</p>\n\n<p><strong>Scene 5: The Exodus</strong></p>\n\n<p>Aaron (addressing the assembled Israelite multitude): We need to sneak out of Egypt quickly without Pharaoh's army noticing. In this demonstration, we hope to show how to leave Egypt without being seen. This is Miriam of the Tribe of Levi. She can not be seen. Now I am going to ask her to stand up. Sister Miriam, will you stand up please?</p>\n\n<p>In the distance Miriam stands up. There is a clap of thunder and Miriam crumples to the ground.</p>\n\n<p>Aaron: This demonstrates the value of not being seen.</p>\n\n<p>(Stop! This is getting too silly!)</p>\n\n<p><strong>Scene 6: Arriving at the Red Sea.</strong></p>\n\n<p>The Red Sea guard challenges the fleeing Israelites as they arrive, saying, \"None shall pass.\"</p>\n\n<p>Guard: What is your name?</p>\n\n<p>Moses: Moses.</p>\n\n<p>Guard: What is your quest?</p>\n\n<p>Moses: To reach the Promised Land.</p>\n\n<p>Guard: What are your favorite colors?</p>\n\n<p>Moses: Blue and white.</p>\n\n<p>Guard: You may pass.</p>\n\n<p>The Israelites pass through the Red Sea. Now Pharaoh's army approaches, led by Rameses.</p>\n\n<p>Guard: What is your name? Rameses: Rameses, Pharaoh of Egypt Guard: What is your quest? Rameses: To bring back the fleeing Israelite slaves.</p>\n\n<p>Guard: What is the capital of modern-day Abyssinia</p>\n\n<p>Rameses: I don't know that.</p>\n\n<p>The guard unleashes a flood of water onto Rameses and the army, drowning them all.</p>\n\n<p>Rameses: Auuugh!</p>\n\n<p>Aaron watches awestruck, then asks Moses how he was able to answer the questions so well. Moses says, \"You have to know these sorts of things when youre a leader of the Israelites, you know.\"</p>\n\n<p>Narrator: Forty years later, after wandering around in the desert searching for the Holy Grail, Moses and Joshua stumble across a dragon ship and sail across the river Jordan to swelling music, but just as everything looks like there will be a happy ending ....</p>\n\n<p>Moses: No afikomen here. Let's head back.</p>\n\n<p>And now for something completely different.</p>\n", "cliptype": "text", "clipsource": "", "featured": 0, "featuredIn": null, "is_public": 1, "is_published": 1, "media": { "image": null, "audio": null, "video": null }, "thumbnail": null, "clip_section": [ { "haggadah_section": "Maggid - Beginning", "slug": "maggid-beginning" } ], "likes": 0, "downloads": 305, "tags": [], "themes": [], "language": "0", "is_bookmarked": "0", "is_liked": 0, "meta_tags": { "title": "Monty Python and The Egyptian Self-Eviction | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "keywords": "", "og:type": "article", "og:url": "https://www.haggadot.com/clip/monty-python-and-egyptian-self-eviction", "og:title": "Monty Python and The Egyptian Self-Eviction | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "og:description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "og:image": "" } } }, "contributed_by": { "author": "Tessa Shlaer", "handle": "tessa-shlaer", "author_initials": "TS", "total_books": 1, "total_clips": 8, "total_followers": 0, "is_following": 0 }, "user_book": null, "clips_by_author": [ { "clip": { "is_admin": 0, "is_owner": 0, "handle": "plate", "title": "The Plate", "author": "Tessa Shlaer", "author_handle": "tessa-shlaer", "author_initials": "TS", "covertext": "Roasted shankbone One of the most striking symbols of Passover is the roasted lamb shankbone (called zeroah), which comm...", "user_image": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/conversions/profile10204145413411958-thumb.jpg", "user_image_original": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/profile10204145413411958", "body": "<p><strong>Roasted shankbone</strong><br />\nOne of the most striking symbols of Passover is the roasted lamb shankbone (called zeroah), which commemorates the paschal (lamb) sacrifice made the night the ancient Hebrews fled Egypt. Some say it symbolizes the outstretched arm of God (the Hebrew word zeroah can mean “arm”). Many vegetarians use a roasted beet instead. This isn’t a new idea; the great Biblical and Talmudic commentator Rashi suggested it back in the eleventh century.</p>\n\n<p><strong>Maror (bitter herb)</strong><br />\nAny bitter herb will work, though horseradish is the most common. Bitter herbs bring tears to the eyes and recall the bitterness of slavery. The Seder refers to the slavery in Egypt, but people are called to look at their own bitter enslavements.</p>\n\n<p><strong>Charoset</strong><br />\nThere’s nothing further from maror than charoset (“cha-ROH-set”), the sweet salad of apples, nuts, wine, and cinnamon that represents the mortar used by the Hebrew slaves to make bricks.</p>\n\n<p><strong>Karpas</strong><br />\nKarpas is a green vegetable, usually parsley (though any spring green will do). Karpas symbolizes the freshness of spring. Some families still use boiled potatoes for karpas, continuing a tradition from Eastern Europe where it was difficult to obtain fresh green vegetables.</p>\n\n<p><strong>Salt water </strong><br />\nSalt water symbolizes the tears and sweat of enslavement, though paradoxically, it’s also a symbol for purity, springtime, and the sea.</p>\n\n<p><strong>Orange </strong><br />\nThe tradition of putting an orange on the seder plate in is a response to a less evolved rabbi who told a young girl that a woman belongs on a bimah as much as an orange on a Seder plate. The orange is now said to be a symbol of the fruitfulness of all Jews, whether they be gay straight, male or female. =</p>\n\n<p><strong>Roasted Egg</strong><br />\nThe roasted egg (baytsah) is a symbol in many different cultures, usually signifying springtime and renewal. Here it stands in place of one of the sacrificial offerings which was performed in the days of the Second Temple. Another popular interpretation is that the egg is like the Jewish people: the hotter you make it for them, the tougher they get.</p>\n\n<p><strong>Boiled Egg (to eat) </strong></p>\n\n<p>May we reflect on our lives this year and soften our hearts to those around us. Another year has passed since we gathered at the Seder table and we are once again reminded that life is fleeting. We are reminded to use each precious moment wisely so that no day will pass without bringing us closer to some worthy achievement as we all take a moment to be aware of how truly blessed and fortunate we are.</p>\n", "cliptype": "text", "clipsource": "", "featured": 0, "featuredIn": null, "is_public": 1, "is_published": 1, "media": { "image": null, "audio": null, "video": null }, "thumbnail": null, "clip_section": [ { "haggadah_section": "Kadesh", "slug": "kadesh" } ], "likes": 0, "downloads": 387, "tags": [], "themes": [], "language": "0", "is_bookmarked": "0", "is_liked": 0, "meta_tags": { "title": "The Plate | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "keywords": "", "og:type": "article", "og:url": "https://www.haggadot.com/clip/plate", "og:title": "The Plate | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "og:description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "og:image": "" } } }, { "clip": { "is_admin": 0, "is_owner": 0, "handle": "time-remembering", "title": "A Time of Remembering", "author": "Tessa Shlaer", "author_handle": "tessa-shlaer", "author_initials": "TS", "covertext": "On this Seder night, we recall with anguish and love our martyred brothers and sisters, the six million Jews of Europe w...", "user_image": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/conversions/profile10204145413411958-thumb.jpg", "user_image_original": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/profile10204145413411958", "body": "<p>On this Seder night, we recall with anguish and love our martyred brothers and sisters, the six million Jews of Europe who were destroyed at the hands of a tyrant more fiendish than Pharaoh. Their memory will never be forgotten.</p>\n\n<p>Trapped in ghettos, caged in death camps, abandoned by an unseeing or uncaring world, Jews gave their lives in acts that sanctified God’s name and the name of the people Israel.</p>\n\n<p>Some rebelled against their tormentors, fighting with makeshift weapons, gathering the last remnants of their failing strength in peerless gestures of courage and defiance.</p>\n\n<p>Others went to their death with their faith in God miraculously unimpaired. Unchecked, unchallenged, evil ran rampant and devoured the holy innocents.</p>\n\n<p>But the <em>light of the Six Million</em> will never be extinguished. Their glow illuminates our path. And we will teach our children and our children’s children to remember them with reverence and with pride. </p>\n", "cliptype": "text", "clipsource": "", "featured": 0, "featuredIn": null, "is_public": 1, "is_published": 1, "media": { "image": null, "audio": null, "video": null }, "thumbnail": null, "clip_section": [ { "haggadah_section": "Introduction", "slug": "introduction" } ], "likes": 0, "downloads": 231, "tags": [], "themes": [], "language": "0", "is_bookmarked": "0", "is_liked": 0, "meta_tags": { "title": "A Time of Remembering | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "keywords": "", "og:type": "article", "og:url": "https://www.haggadot.com/clip/time-remembering", "og:title": "A Time of Remembering | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "og:description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "og:image": "" } } }, { "clip": { "is_admin": 0, "is_owner": 0, "handle": "four-questions-140", "title": "The Four Questions", "author": "Tessa Shlaer", "author_handle": "tessa-shlaer", "author_initials": "TS", "covertext": "The formal telling of the story of Passover is framed as a discussion with lots of questions and answers. The tradition...", "user_image": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/conversions/profile10204145413411958-thumb.jpg", "user_image_original": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/profile10204145413411958", "body": "<p>The formal telling of the story of Passover is framed as a discussion with lots of questions and answers. The tradition that the youngest person asks the questions reflects the centrality of involving everyone in the seder.</p>\n\n<p><span>Asking questions is a core tradition in Jewish life. </span>The rabbis who created the set format for the seder gave us the Four Questions to help break the ice in case no one had their own questions. If everyone at your seder is around the same age, perhaps the person with the least seder experience can ask them – or everyone can sing them all together.</p>\n\n<p><u><strong><em>Why is this night different from all other nights? </em></strong></u></p>\n\n<p><strong>מַה נִּשְׁתַּנָּה הַלַּֽיְלָה הַזֶּה מִכָּל הַלֵּילות</strong></p>\n\n<p>Ma nishtana halaila hazeh mikol haleilot (mikol haleilot)?</p>\n\n<p><em>1. On all other nights, we eat either leavened or unleavened bread. Why on this night do we eat only matzah? </em></p>\n\n<p><strong>שֶׁבְּכָל הַלֵּילוֹת אָֽנוּ אוֹכלין חָמֵץ וּמַצָּה הַלַּֽיְלָה הַזֶּה כֻּלּוֹ מצה</strong></p>\n\n<p>Shebichol haleilot anu ochlin chameitz u-matzah (chameitz u-matzah).<br />\nHalaila hazeh (halaila hazeh) kulo matzah.</p>\n\n<p><em>2. On all other nights, we eat vegetables of all kinds. Why on this night must we eat bitter herbs? </em></p>\n\n<p><strong>שֶׁבְּכָל הַלֵּילוֹת אָֽנוּ אוֹכְלִין שְׁאָר יְרָקוֹת הַלַּֽיְלָה הַזֶּה מָרוֹר</strong></p>\n\n<p>Shebichol haleilot anu ochlin shi’ar yirakot (shi'ar yirakot)<br />\nhaleila hazeh (haleila hazeh) maror.</p>\n\n<p><em>3. On all other nights, we do not dip vegetables even once. Why on this night do we dip twice greens into salt water and bitter herbs into sweet charoset? </em></p>\n\n<p><strong>שֶׁבְּכָל הַלֵּילוֹת אֵין אָֽנוּ מַטְבִּילִין אֲפִילוּ פַּֽעַם אחָת הַלַּֽיְלָה הַזֶּה שְׁתֵּי פְעמים</strong></p>\n\n<p>Shebichol haleilot ain anu matbilin afilu pa-am echat (afilu pa-am echat).<br />\nHalaila hazeh (Halaila hazeh) shtei fi-amim.</p>\n\n<p><em>4. On all other nights, everyone sits up straight at the table. Why on this night do we recline and eat at leisure?</em></p>\n\n<p><strong>שֶׁבְּכָל הַלֵּילוֹת אָֽנוּ אוֹכְלִין בֵּין יוֹשְׁבִין וּבֵין מְסֻבִּין. :הַלַּֽיְלָה הַזֶּה כֻּלָּֽנוּ מְסֻבין</strong></p>\n\n<p>Shebichol haleilot anu ochlin bein yoshvin uvein m’subin (bein yoshvin uvein m’subin).<br />\nHalaila hazeh (Halaila hazeh) kulanu m’subin.</p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Does anyone else have any questions they'd like to ask?</strong></p>\n", "cliptype": "text", "clipsource": "", "featured": 0, "featuredIn": null, "is_public": 1, "is_published": 1, "media": { "image": null, "audio": null, "video": null }, "thumbnail": null, "clip_section": [ { "haggadah_section": "-- Four Questions", "slug": "four-questions" } ], "likes": 0, "downloads": 235, "tags": [], "themes": [], "language": "0", "is_bookmarked": "0", "is_liked": 0, "meta_tags": { "title": "The Four Questions | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "keywords": "", "og:type": "article", "og:url": "https://www.haggadot.com/clip/four-questions-140", "og:title": "The Four Questions | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "og:description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "og:image": "" } } }, { "clip": { "is_admin": 0, "is_owner": 0, "handle": "modern-take-four-or-five-children", "title": "A Modern Take on The Four (or Five) Children", "author": "Tessa Shlaer", "author_handle": "tessa-shlaer", "author_initials": "TS", "covertext": "You can look at the four sons as four generations of Jews in America today. The first generation of eastern European Jew...", "user_image": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/conversions/profile10204145413411958-thumb.jpg", "user_image_original": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/profile10204145413411958", "body": "<p>You can look at the four sons as four generations of Jews in America today.</p>\n\n<p><strong>The first generation</strong> of eastern European Jewry who emigrated to America at the turn of the century are represented by THE WISE CHILD. This is the Jew who grew up with a strong connection to the Jewish way of life. His commitment to Judaism is unshakable.</p>\n\n<p>His son, <strong>the second generation</strong>, is represented in the WICKED CHILD. This is the rebel who wants to succeed in his new life and take on Western values. Although he has grown up in a home full of Jewish values and an integrated Jewish life, he rejects this in favor of integrating into Western society and becoming accepted as the new American.</p>\n\n<p>His son, <strong>the third generation</strong>, is represented by the SIMPLE CHILD. This child has spent Seder nights at his grandparents' table and has seen his grandmother light the Shabbat candles. He has a spattering of knowledge picked up at Hebrew school, but he doesn't know the meaning behind any of the symbols and is not very motivated to go beyond what he sees.</p>\n\n<p>His son, <strong>the fourth generation</strong>, is represented in the UNINFORMED CHILD, who doesn't know how or what to ask. This child does not have memories of his great grandparents. He celebrates the American holidays and other than knowing that he is a Jew, has no connection whatsoever to Judaism. He sits at a traditional Seder night and does not even know what to ask because it is all so foreign to him.</p>\n\n<p>Today there is a fifth son, the ABSENT CHILD, who is off in India or out at the movies on Seder night, not even aware that Passover exists. Anyone sitting at the Seder table is still connected to the Jewish people and heritage just by being there. We just need to get him interested enough to ask a question so a door can be opened for him</p>\n", "cliptype": "text", "clipsource": "", "featured": 0, "featuredIn": null, "is_public": 1, "is_published": 1, "media": { "image": null, "audio": null, "video": null }, "thumbnail": null, "clip_section": [ { "haggadah_section": "-- Four Children", "slug": "four-children" } ], "likes": 0, "downloads": 242, "tags": [], "themes": [], "language": "0", "is_bookmarked": "0", "is_liked": 0, "meta_tags": { "title": "A Modern Take on The Four (or Five) Children | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "keywords": "", "og:type": "article", "og:url": "https://www.haggadot.com/clip/modern-take-four-or-five-children", "og:title": "A Modern Take on The Four (or Five) Children | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "og:description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "og:image": "" } } }, { "clip": { "is_admin": 0, "is_owner": 0, "handle": "birkat-hamazon-post-meal-grace-and-third-cup", "title": "Birkat Hamazon! (Post-meal \"Grace\") and the Third Cup", "author": "Tessa Shlaer", "author_handle": "tessa-shlaer", "author_initials": "TS", "covertext": "Refill everyone’s wine glass. We now say \"grace\" after the meal (a.k.a. The Birkat Hamazon): (Below is the Hebrew and th...", "user_image": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/conversions/profile10204145413411958-thumb.jpg", "user_image_original": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/profile10204145413411958", "body": "<p>Refill everyone’s wine glass. We now say \"grace\" after the meal (a.k.a. The Birkat Hamazon):</p>\n\n<p>(Below is the Hebrew and then the transliteration of the Hebrew, which is chanted in silliness and joy):</p>\n\n<p>שִׁיר הַמַּעֲלוֹת:</p>\n\n<p>בְּשׁוּב יהוה אֶת־שִׁיבַת צִיּוֹן הָיִ֫ינוּ כְּחֹלְמִים. אָז יִמָּלֵא שְׂחוֹק פִּינוּ וּלְשׁוֹנֵנוּ רִנָּה, אָז יֹאמְרוּ בַגּוֹיִם, הִגְדִּיל יְיָ לַעֲשׂוֹת עִם אֵלֶּה. הִגְדִּיל יְיָ לַעֲשׂוֹת עִמָּנוּ, הָיִינוּ שְׂמֵחִים. שׁוּבָה יְיָ אֶת שְׁבִיתֵנוּ, כַּאֲפִיקִים בַּנֶּגֶב. הַזֹּרְעִים בְּדִמְעָה בְּרִנָּה יִקְצֹרוּ. הָלוֹךְ יֵלֵךְ וּבָכֹה נֹשֵׂא מֶשֶׁךְ הַזָּרַע, בֹּא יָבֹא בְרִנָּה נֹשֵׂא אֲלֻמֹּתָיו.</p>\n\n<p>תְּהִלַּת יְיָ יְדַבֶּר פִּי, וִיבָרֵךְ כָּל בָּשָׂר שֵׁם קָדְשׁוֹ לְעוֹלָם וָעֶד. וַאֲנַחְנוּ נְבָרֵךְ יָהּ מֵעַתָּה וְעַד עוֹלָם הַלְלוּיָהּ. הוֹדוּ לַייָ כִּי טוֹב כִּי לְעוֹלָם חַסְדּוֹ. מִי יְמַלֵּל גְּבוּרוֹת יְיָ יַשְׁמִיעַ כָּל תְּהִלָּתוֹ</p>\n\n<p> <em>Shir Hama’alot, b’shuv Adonai et shee-vat Tzion, ha-yeenu k’chol meem. Az y’ma-lei s’chok pee-nu u’l-sho-nei-nu reena, az yo-m’ru va-goyim, heeg-deel Adonai la-asot eem eleh. Heeg-deel Adonai la-asot eemanu, ha-yee-nu s’mei-cheem. Shuva Adonai et sh’vee-tei-nu, ka-afee-keem ba-negev. Ha-zor-eem b’deem-ah b’reena yeek-tzo-ru. Ha-loch yei-lech u-va-cho no-sei me-shech hazara, bo yavo v’reena, no-sei alu-mo-tav.</em> </p>\n\n<p> <em>Chaverai n’varech! Y’Hishim Adonai m’vorach m’vetach v’adolam! Y’Hishim Adonai m’vorach m’vetach v’adolam, birshut chaverai n’varach eloheinu shelchanuh m’sheloh. birshut chaverai n’varach eloheinu shelchanuh m’sheloh, uvtuvoh chaeinu!</em> </p>\n\n<p> <em><strong>Baruch u’vuroch shemoh!</strong></em> </p>\n\n<p> <em>Baruch Atah Adonai! </em> </p>\n\n<p> <em>Eloheinu melech ha’olam, hazan et ha’olam kulo b’tuvo b’chen b’chesed uv’rachamin. Hu noten lechem l’chol basar ki l’olam chasdo. Uv’tuvo hagadol tamid lo chasar lanu v’al yech’sar lanu mason l’olam va’ed. Ba’avur sh’mo hagadol ki hu zan um’farnes lakol umetiv lakol umechin mazon l’chol b’riyotav asher bara. </em> </p>\n\n<p> <em>Baruch Atah Adonai, hazan et hakol!</em> </p>\n\n<p>We now give thanks for the food we have eaten. We praise Adonai, Ruler of the Universe, whose goodness sustains the world. (You are the origin of love and compassion, the source of bread for all.)</p>\n\n<p>We praise God, source of food for everyone. As it says in the Torah: When you have eaten and are satisfied, give praise to your God who has given you this good earth.</p>\n\n<p>We praise God for the earth and for its sustenance. Renew our spiritual center in our time.</p>\n\n<p>We praise God, who centers us. May the source of peace grant peace to us, to the Jewish people, and to the entire world. Amen.</p>\n\n<p><strong>The Third Glass of Wine</strong></p>\n\n<p>The blessing over the meal is immediately followed by another blessing over the wine:</p>\n\n<p>בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה יְיָ, אֱלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם, בּוֹרֵא פְּרִי הַגָּפֶן</p>\n\n<p>Baruch Atah Adonai, Eloheinu Melech ha-olam, borei p’ree hagafen.</p>\n\n<p>We praise God, Ruler of Everything, who creates the fruit of the vine.</p>\n\n<p>Drink the third glass of wine!</p>\n", "cliptype": "text", "clipsource": "", "featured": 0, "featuredIn": null, "is_public": 1, "is_published": 1, "media": { "image": null, "audio": null, "video": null }, "thumbnail": null, "clip_section": [ { "haggadah_section": "Bareich", "slug": "bareich" } ], "likes": 0, "downloads": 274, "tags": [], "themes": [], "language": "0", "is_bookmarked": "0", "is_liked": 0, "meta_tags": { "title": "Birkat Hamazon! (Post-meal \"Grace\") and the Third Cup | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "keywords": "", "og:type": "article", "og:url": "https://www.haggadot.com/clip/birkat-hamazon-post-meal-grace-and-third-cup", "og:title": "Birkat Hamazon! (Post-meal \"Grace\") and the Third Cup | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "og:description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "og:image": "" } } }, { "clip": { "is_admin": 0, "is_owner": 0, "handle": "contemporary-dayenu", "title": "Contemporary Dayenu", "author": "Tessa Shlaer", "author_handle": "tessa-shlaer", "author_initials": "TS", "covertext": "So let’s bring Dayeinu into the present tonight. We have a vision, we take it to heart, and we work hard to make it happ...", "user_image": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/conversions/profile10204145413411958-thumb.jpg", "user_image_original": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/profile10204145413411958", "body": "<p>So let’s bring Dayeinu into the present tonight. We have a vision, we take it to heart, and we work hard to make it happen. We are grateful, and yet what miracles and accomplishments would be sufficient <strong>(Dayeinu)</strong> in today’s world for us to be truly satisfied?</p>\n\n<p>1. When all workers of the world receive just compensation and respect for their labors, enjoy safe, healthy and secure working conditions and can take pride in their work. . . <strong>Dayeinu</strong></p>\n\n<p>2. When governments end the escalating production of devastating weapons, secure in the knowledge that they will not be necessary. . . <strong>Dayeinu </strong></p>\n\n<p>3. When technology is for the production and conservation of energy and our other natural resources is developed so that we can maintain responsible and comfortable lifestyles and still assure a safe environment for our children. . . <strong>Dayeinu </strong></p>\n\n<p>4. When the air, water, fellow creatures and beautiful world are protected for the benefit and enjoyment of all, and given priority over development for the sake of profits. . . <strong>Dayeinu </strong></p>\n\n<p>5. When all people live freely, practicing their beliefs and cultures without interference or persecution. . . <strong>Dayeinu</strong></p>\n\n<p>6. When all women and men are allowed to make their own decisions on matters regarding their own bodies and their personal relationships without discrimination or legal consequences. . . <strong>Dayeinu </strong></p>\n\n<p>7. When people of all ages, sexes, races, religions, cultures and nations respect and appreciate one another. . . <strong>Dayeinu </strong> </p>\n\n<p>8. When all children grow up in freedom, without hunger, and with the love and support they need to realize their full potential. . .<strong> Dayeinu </strong></p>\n\n<p>9. When all children, men and women are free of the threat of violence, abuse and domination; when personal power and strength are not used as weapons. . . <strong>Dayeinu</strong></p>\n\n<p>10. When all people have access to the information and care they need for their physical, mental and spiritual well-being. . . <strong>Dayeinu</strong></p>\n\n<p>11. When food and shelter are accepted as human rights, not as commodities, and are available to all. . .<strong> Dayeinu </strong></p>\n\n<p>12. When no elderly person in our society has to fear hunger, cold, or loneliness. . . <strong>Dayeinu</strong></p>\n\n<p>13. When the people of the Middle East, and all people living in strife, are able to create paths to just and lasting peace. . . <strong>Dayeinu</strong></p>\n\n<p>14. When people everywhere have the opportunities we have to celebrate our culture and use it as a basis for progressive change in the world. . . <strong>Dayeinu</strong></p>\n\n<p>All: If tonight each person could say this year I worked as hard as I could toward my goals for improving this world, so that one day all people can experience the joy and freedom I feel sitting with my family and friends at the Seder table. . . <strong>Dayeinu, Dayeinu</strong></p>\n", "cliptype": "text", "clipsource": "", "featured": 0, "featuredIn": null, "is_public": 1, "is_published": 1, "media": { "image": null, "audio": null, "video": null }, "thumbnail": null, "clip_section": [ { "haggadah_section": "-- Cup #2 & Dayenu", "slug": "cup-2-amp-dayenu" } ], "likes": 0, "downloads": 384, "tags": [], "themes": [], "language": "0", "is_bookmarked": "0", "is_liked": 0, "meta_tags": { "title": "Contemporary Dayenu | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "keywords": "", "og:type": "article", "og:url": "https://www.haggadot.com/clip/contemporary-dayenu", "og:title": "Contemporary Dayenu | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "og:description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "og:image": "" } } }, { "clip": { "is_admin": 0, "is_owner": 0, "handle": "few-readings", "title": "A Few Readings", "author": "Tessa Shlaer", "author_handle": "tessa-shlaer", "author_initials": "TS", "covertext": "Hope for a Jewish Sanctuary in Israel  They marched us down the length of Pozohony Street, toward the Margaret Bridge an...", "user_image": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/conversions/profile10204145413411958-thumb.jpg", "user_image_original": "https://assets.haggadot.com/users/105281/profile10204145413411958", "body": "<p><strong>Hope for a Jewish Sanctuary in Israel </strong></p>\n\n<p>They marched us down the length of Pozohony Street, toward the Margaret Bridge and that was when we understood they were bringing us to the edge of the Danube, where they would shoot us and leave us to die under the ice. When we arrived at the foot of the bridge, a Soviet reconnaissance aircraft appeared out of nowhere over our heads. The death march stopped, and there was a moment of chaos while the Nazi guards sought refuge in the entrance to buildings and shot their sub machine guns skyward. Mother and I were standing next to a small public toilet of metal and painted green and mother pushed me inside. ‘Pretend you’re peeing’ she said. I stood there frozen with cold and fear, but I could not pee; when you are thirteen years old and frightened you cannot pee. The Soviet plane had meanwhile disappeared and the march resumed. Not a soul noticed that mother and I had remained in the toilet. Half an hour later, not a single person from the march was left alive. This was a key moment in my life, the moment that defines me more accurately than any other – more than anything I ever did, more than any place I ever visited, more than any person I have ever met. Not because I was spared – every survivor has his own story or a private miracle – but because I had nowhere to go….in this big wide world there was not a single place for a Jewish boy of thirteen whom everyone wants to kill. So we went back to the ghetto. Years later on a trip I took to Budapest with my son Yair, we took a walk and found ourselves, without planning to, at the Margaret Bridge. We strolled along, chatting merrily when suddenly I stopped and, shaking, pointed at something ahead of us. At first Yair could not understand what it was that I was pointing at, but there it was: the public toilet made of metal and painted green. We stood there, two grown men, hugging and crying and stroking the green walls of the public toilet that saved my life, while the Hungarians who passed us on the street did so with caution, convinced they were looking at two lunatics. ‘My boy,’ I said once I was calm enough to speak, ‘it was in this place, without my even knowing it that I became a Zionist. It is the whole Zionist idea in fact, The State of Israel is a problematic place, and we’ll always have our arguments with it, but this is the very reason it was established. So that every Jewish child will always have a place to go.’ I hope that Yair understood. I am certain that he did not forget. -Yair Lapid, Memories After My Death</p>\n\n<p><strong>This Year We Are Slaves</strong></p>\n\n<p>What do these words mean?<br />\nWe are slaves because yesterday our people were in slavery and memory makes yesterday real for us.<br />\nWe are slaves because today there are still people in chains around the world and no one can be truly free while others are in chains.<br />\nWe are slaves because freedom means more than broken chains.<br />\nWhere there is poverty and hunger and homelessness, there is no freedom; where there is prejudice and bigotry and discrimination, there is no freedom; where there is violence and torture and war, there is no freedom.<br />\nAnd where each of us is less than he or she might be, we are not free, not yet.<br />\nAnd who, this year, can be deaf to the continuing oppression of the downtrodden, who can be blind to the burdens and the rigors that are now to be added to the most vulnerable in our midst?<br />\nIf these things be so, who among us can say that he or she is free?</p>\n\n<p><strong>What Happens to Them Happens to Me</strong> (Martin Luther King, Jr. and Abraham J. Heschel) </p>\n\n<p><strong>Leader</strong> Prejudice is like a hydra, a monster which has many heads, an evil which requires many efforts to overcome. One head sends forth poison against the people of a different race, another against the people of a different religion or culture. Thus the evil of prejudice is indivisible.</p>\n\n<p><strong> Group</strong> Human progress never rolls in on the wheels of inevitability. It comes through the tireless efforts and the persistent work of dedicated individuals who are willing to be co-workers with God. Without this hard work, time itself becomes an ally of the insurgent and primitive forces of irrational emotionalism and social stagnation.</p>\n\n<p><strong>Leader</strong> What is called for is not a silent sigh but a voice of moral compassion and indignation, the sublime and inspired screaming of a prophet uttered by a whole community.</p>\n\n<p><strong>Group</strong> The voice of justice is stronger than bigotry and the hour calls for that voice as well as the concerted and incessant action.</p>\n\n<p><strong>Leader</strong> I have personal faith. I believe firmly that in spite of the difficulties of these days, in spite of the struggles ahead, we will and we can solve this problem. I believe there will be a better America.</p>\n", "cliptype": "text", "clipsource": "", "featured": 0, "featuredIn": null, "is_public": 1, "is_published": 1, "media": { "image": null, "audio": null, "video": null }, "thumbnail": null, "clip_section": [ { "haggadah_section": "Nirtzah", "slug": "nirtzah" } ], "likes": 0, "downloads": 226, "tags": [], "themes": [], "language": "0", "is_bookmarked": "0", "is_liked": 0, "meta_tags": { "title": "A Few Readings | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "keywords": "", "og:type": "article", "og:url": "https://www.haggadot.com/clip/few-readings", "og:title": "A Few Readings | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "og:description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "og:image": "" } } } ], "clip_remake_history": 0, "meta_tags": { "title": "Monty Python and The Egyptian Self-Eviction | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "keywords": "", "og:type": "article", "og:url": "https://www.haggadot.com/clip/monty-python-and-egyptian-self-eviction", "og:title": "Monty Python and The Egyptian Self-Eviction | Passover haggadah by Tessa Shlaer", "og:description": "Our simple platform allows you to create a custom Passover Haggadah, with access to unique content contributed by our community. Find artwork, family", "og:image": "" } }