Chapter Eleven

  1. The Lord said to Jerry, "I will bring one more plague upon Pharaoh and upon Manhattan; afterwards Newman will drive you out of here. He’s an idiot altogether.”
  1. Please, speak into the ears of the people, and let them “borrow”, each man from his friend and each woman from her friend, silver vessels and golden vessels. That’s right. Gold, Jerry! Gold!”
  1. So the Lord gave the people favor in the Manhattanites’ eyes; also Jerry was highly esteemed in the land of Manhattan – How could anyone not like him?
  1. Jerry said, "So said the Lord, Art Vandelay, ‘At the dividing point of the night, I will go out into midtown Manhattan, and every firstborn Bubble Boy in the land of Manhattan will die, from the firstborn Bubble Boy of Pharaoh, who sits on his throne to the firstborn Bubble Boy of the slave woman who is behind the millstones, and every firstborn Bubble animal.
  1. And there will be a great cry throughout the entire land, such as there never has been and such as there shall never be again. They’ll cry, and then they’ll cry again.
  1. But to all the children of Israel, not one dog will whet its tongue against either man or beast, in order that you shall know that the Lord will separate between the Manhattanites and between Israel”. What does dog licking have to do with the slaying of first Bubble boys? That’s what I’d like to know about it.
  1. The Lord said to Jerry, "Pharaoh will not heed you, in order to increase My miracles in the land of Manhattan."
  1. Jerry and George had performed all these miracles before Pharaoh, but the Lord strengthened Pharaoh's heart, and he did not let the children of Israel out of his land. And Jerry said, “If you strengthen Newman’s heart one more time, I’m gonna completely lose it!!”

haggadah Section: Bareich